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We originally ran this on Valentine’s Day, a Hallmark holiday. Today is National Orgasm Day, not a Hallmark holiday. Enjoy the holiday! -ed.

Keeping romance alive is hard (pun intended). So we asked adult entertainers Jesse Jane, Mia Malkova, Selena Rose and Draven Star how they keep the spark alive. Since not everyone can perform (pun?) at their level, we also asked our advice columnist Andrew Bucket about love. And since there are people in marriages and not in the porn or advice industry, married man Brandon Wetherbee also answered the questions.

What’s the best way to meet people?

Jesse Jane: Go out to a party with friends or go to events and socialize with people, that way you can tell if you have an instant connection or chemistry with that person.

Mia Malkova: Through other friends, definitely.

Selena Rose: I meet people everywhere I go, what I do is talk to who’s around me and socialize. It’s always nice to know what people do and what they’re all about.

Draven Star: Personally, I’m kind of awkward. I think just going out to shit you like to do, and meeting like minded people is amazing, but sometimes it can’t always happen so I think the Internet doesn’t suck for meeting people.

Andrew Bucket: By pulling your head out of your ass. You’re surrounded by people all day when you’re walking around in the world. Start saying hi to strangers. It’s not weird, it’s neighborly.

Brandon Wetherbee: Force them to answer whatever questions pop into your head because it’s your job. Get a job as an online magazine editor. Or at church. Or on the bus.

How do you keep your relationships interesting?

Jesse Jane: I always try to do different things and go out to different places while hanging out with different people. I try to always spice it up in the bedroom because you have to keep things interesting so nothing gets old.

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Mia Malkova: Never stop making love and always try to do fun things together.

Selena Rose: Keeping a relationship alive is hard, the key is to stay looking attractive in your partner’s eyes, take vacations every two months and always cater to your partner’s needs.

Draven Star: Surprises. Always surprises. Relationships are fun and exciting at the beginning because you’re always thinking or daydreaming about the other person. It gets boring when that stops. Even if it something small; like you’re stopping at 7-11 for cigarettes before going to their place, so you grab them one of their favorite sodas. Small, thoughtful things go really far.

Andrew Bucket: A healthy combination of mutual and individual pursuits.

Brandon Wetherbee: Read the same books so you can talk about what you’re reading, ask questions like, “How was your day?,” get a second cat so you have a shared complaint about Vet bills, work out so you don’t get fatter, go to far away places like Baltimore and Richmond.

Chocolates? Flowers? Lingerie? What’s your ideal Valentine’s Day gift?

Jesse Jane: I love it all, any girl would but my favorite is lingerie! I love to get dolled up, dressed up and role play. Being all sexy in the bedroom is so fun and it makes you feel real good!

Mia Malkova: Chocolate and flowers! I will be especially pissed if I don’t receive chocolates!

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Selena Rose: My ideal valentine’s gift would be chocolates, flowers and I also love a nice surprise, maybe a vacation or a nice ring.

Draven Star: Flowers are pretty but I’ve never asked for or expected them. I think they are lovely, and I appreciate them but yeah. Lingerie is very sexy, but I think its sexier to be taken lingerie shopping. I’m not one to think that Valentine’s Day should be strictly flowers or chocolates. If your persons favorite band is coming around….fuck those chocolates, man. Lets go see a show.

Andrew Bucket: Experiential.

Brandon Wetherbee: When I was 13 I bought my girlfriend a Marilyn Manson candle and she bought me a Nirvana t-shirt. Upon leaving her friend’s house I saw the girlfriend making out with an 18-year-old dropout in a shitty car. It was the best series of gifts I’ve ever given or received: a Nirvana shirt with a no-guilt breakup.

How do you keep the sexual spark alive with your partner when your job is literally having sex with not your partner?

Jesse Jane: Sex is always different in your personal life than in your business life and since I don’t shoot a lot it’s easy for me to handle that aspect of my life. Sex is best when you have feelings for the person, and believe me I’m always horny so my man never gets bored or tired!

Mia Malkova: It’s not hard to keep the sex amazing with your partner because you love that person, and the sex will always be better than sex with strangers.

Selena Rose: Having sex comes naturally to me and being a sexual freak is in me at all times of the day. I’m just a horny chick so my partner is always satisfied. I also make sure to dress up in sexy lingerie sometimes to keep him excited.

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Draven Star: The connection I have to my fiance is unlike any other connection I’ve ever had. With that said, I’m just slutty and like sex. I touch him constantly. Holding his arm as we walk, or one of the 5785476348675 times a day I’ll grab his dick. Seriously, just touch your dudes dick all the time. They love that shit. Sleep naked. Shower together when you can. Memorize each others scent. Have sex in the morning after you’ve showered so you can feel them on you all day. Sext, send naked snapchats. Take the TV OUT of your bedroom. Remember that bedrooms have doors, they can be closed to everyone but your partner…so be your filthiest self in there.

Andrew Bucket: I imagine porn is a lot of theatre, and that the stars are very different with their partners.

Brandon Wetherbee: Agree that 13 Going On 30 is one of the strangest, most horrible portrayals of modern women and romance and go from there.

Is it possible to make an STD test romantic?

Jesse Jane: Ugh not really! But I think it’s good for the couple but definitely not romantic.

Mia Malkova: Nooo!

Selena Rose: I think STD testing could be an awkward moment if you make it odd. In my case if I would just flirt with my partner the whole time we are at the clinic and make him horny, tell him how good I’ll suck his cock, it’ll make him feel like he’s in Heaven.

Draven Star: Absolutely. Even if you aren’t into medical settings or blood like me…being clean is hot. Knowing the status of the person you’re with is so important. What’s sexier than safety and trust?

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Andrew Bucket: Knowing is definitely beautiful, but not romantic. Unless the doctor signs your results.

Brandon Wetherbee: My friend just saw Dallas Buyers Club and is now convinced she’s HIV+.

Is it easier to date within or outside of the porn industry?

Jesse Jane: It’s hard from both perspectives but I date outside of the industry. It’s always cool to date a pornstar until you develop feelings for them. You have to find someone secure enough to handle the profession but no matter what it’s hard.

Mia Malkova: I will let you know, so far I’ve only dated within the industry and I’m having a lot of jealousy issues.

Selena Rose: I live in Florida, not many pornstars in Miami, so normal guys have a higher chance to get with me.

Draven Star: I think it’s easier to date whoever you can be yourself with. I know people who date within porn, people who date outside, and people who dated someone outside of porn and then brought them into the industry. Personally I’ve never dated another performer, but my fiance has started doing cam shows with me. It depends on the person and what they can honestly handle. This industry isn’t for everyone.

Andrew Bucket: I could never really know, but I bet it’s like dating another comic: pretty fun, but a whole lot of crazy.

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Brandon Wetherbee: My wife is a journalist. Based on House of Cards, she’s currently sleeping with a Senator. Based on The Newsroom, her reporting on Osama bin Laden’s death gave America an orgasm. Journalism is DC porn. It’s easier to date within. They know everything and have interesting friends.

 

Do you feel like working in the porn industry has made you better at sex with your partner?

Jesse Jane: Yes, because I work with professionals, they definitely know things I don’t so I learn more crazy and fun things every time!

Mia Malkova: Absolutely, practice makes perfect! We are not born knowing!

Selena Rose: Yes working in the porn industry as a performer has definitely taught me how to be okay with my sexuality and the nastier and sexier I am, the more my partner likes it.

Draven Star: Porn sex isn’t like normal sex, in normal sex you aren’t trying to open up for a camera, but I mean…practice makes perfect!

Brandon Wetherbee: I worked at OP Video, a neighborhood video rental store, when I was 15. The store had an adult section. I would rent out the pornographer at $10 for 2 hours for classmates. I would not put these rentals in the system or register because you’re not supposed to rent pornography to 15-year-olds. I would pocket an extra $50 to $100 a week by working with the porn industry. It made me much better at sex.

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What is the most romantic porn out there and why?

Jesse Jane: Digital Playground’s “Island Fever” series because they’re beautiful, sexy and in a romantic tropical location with only music – very visually stimulating.

Mia Malkova: Gonzo porn, because it’s real passion.

Selena Rose: I would say the most romantic porn movies out there are Digital Playground porn. My movies are mostly all very romantic and I like to show my partner lots of affection, it makes couple movies more realistic.

Draven Star: HAHA, MINE!!! Honestly, I think its really hot when the performers have good chemistry and you can see that they aren’t juuuust performing.

Andrew Bucket: I think the Pam and Tommy Lee sex tape is pretty romantic. They were so in love.

Brandon Wetherbee: I agree with Bucket. I like when he steers the boat with his dick.

What’s your favorite rom-com?

Jesse Jane: I like them all!

Mia Malkova: Love Actually and The Wedding Date.

Draven Star: Bridesmaids. I don’t know if that counts as a rom-com but it makes me laugh so hard I cry a little.

Andrew Bucket: The Money Pit. It’s such a perfect movie and never gets cred.

Brandon Wetherbee: The Sonic Youth “Dirty Boots” video.

Any parting words you’d like to add?

Jesse Jane: Never be afraid to try new things in bed like dressing up for your partner because keeping things new keeps your relationship fresh and exciting.

Draven Star: Don’t get hung up on dumb shit. Be yourself, make yourself happy and get yourself off. People wanna be around rad, happy people. Also, you guys can check me out on www.doomdoll.com, www.burningangel.com, on instagram at instagram.com/thedoomdoll and on twitter at @thedoomdoll. My new DVD Sharkbait is out soon….and people are romantically eaten by a shark so you don’t wanna miss that, either. Thanks! <3

Andrew Bucket: Companionship may distract you for many years from the probability that you will not die first. Love is a type of escapism from our ultimate fate of total mortal solitude.

Brandon Wetherbee: Just ask for what you want. And be nice when asking.

 

Follow Jesse Jane at @jessejane, Selena Rose at @realselenarose and Mia Malkova at @MiaMalkova. All three performers can be found on the Digital Playground site. Follow Draven Star on Twitter at @thedoomdoll, Instagram at thedoomdoll, Tumblr at doomdoll.com and can be found on the Burning Angel site.

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