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Welcome back to another round of Sad Girl Taste Test, the show (which is not actually a show) where I go around eating fast food monstrosities (in this case, the highly demanded chicken sandwich from Popeyes) so you don’t have to, and then I tell a long and winding tale full of extraneous (depressing) details before revealing my final verdict!

As I assume most of you are aware, these things flew off shelves, to the point that they were temporarily removed from the menu entirely. Until this past Sunday, that is, which is when the sandwich made its big (and in at least one instance, fatal) return to Popeyes restaurants around the country. 

When I woke up 48 hours ago, I had zero intention of being the first (or even the last) person waiting in line to try one out. Instead, I was NYC Marathon-bound to cheer on a lot of humans who are way better than I am! (Or at least slightly faster!) You would think that hours of watching people from all over the world giving their all to get across that finish line would inspire me to be my personal best. And don’t get me wrong, I thought that, too! But then I decided to go drink beer and eat nachos at a sports bar with my friend, and any/all newfound ambition I had went out the window. SUNDAY FUNDAY INDEED.

But even with the beers and the nachos, I still had no intention of getting my hands on a Popeyes fried chicken sandwich. Instead, I harnessed my mild inebriation for semi-good, aka agreeing to go on a spontaneous Tinder date, which motivated me to clean my apartment and shave my legs (y’know, just in case). As predicted, the Tinder date canceled an hour and a half before we were supposed to meet up, but I decided to go out anyway ‘cause HAVIN’ FUN IS FUN! (Plus my now-smooth legs were far too aerodynamic to sit still.) And I did have fun, and then I thought to myself, “Hey wow, wouldn’t it be so next-level sad in a very hilarious way if I ended my night at Popeyes?” So that’s literally what I did, and they miraculously had the chicken sandwich ($3.99, 690 calories) in stock, and that is how we have arrived at this piece of uplifting #C0NT3NT! 

Not the best presentation, Popeyes. (ALSO SORRY FOR THE LATE NIGHT LIGHTING.)

Of course, you may be wondering the age-old question – did I go with the classic chicken sandwich or the spicy chicken sandwich? To which I say “SPICY, DUH!” If you’re bummed out that I didn’t go full basic, I am truly sorry. But I will never not choose the spicy option.

And now you may be wondering the other age-old question – HOW DID IT TASTE?! To which I say “Oh my god. SO. GOOD.”

But seriously, SO. GOOD. Yes, the presentation left a bit to be desired (so it didn’t look like the advert – what the fuck did you expect), but taste and texture-wise it was a total home run. The chicken was both juicy and crispy, there was a good kick of spice from the mayo without blowing my head off, the softness of the brioche bun was a good offset to the crunchy elements, and heck yes for pickles! (The perfect amount of tang to balance out all the fatty richness! BRB, changing my name to Fatty Richness!)

I would absolutely order this again regardless of inebriation level. And the best part? We don’t need goddamn Chick-fil-A anymore, you guys! (Seriously, please stop eating at Chick-fil-A.) Mega-props to Popeyes for this v. welcome menu addition, and here’s hoping they’re able to keep ‘em coming for good this time.