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Jenn Tisdale is a D.C. stand up comic. Follow her on Twitter at @Jenn_Tisdale. She’ll be at the Wonderland Ballroom on Friday, August 10 and co-hosting You, Me, Them, Everybody with guest Mary-Alice Farina, comic Matty Litwack and music from Marian McLaughlin.

Roseanne Barr is running for President. Is this still a thing? Yes, it’s still a thing. The Green Party didn’t want her which is shocking because they love everyone. Now she’s on the Peace & Freedom ticket and they stand for peace, freedom, and everything that was great about the 70’s. I was not alive during the 70’s but I’ve watched a lot of footage involving people having a really good time. #BellBottomsSanFrancisco

I followed Roseanne on Twitter, but unfollowed when it became clear that she only wanted to tweet about how great marijuana is and why we should legalize it. Basically she tweeted about the 70’s. #DrugsNotHugs

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJfZvtM943Y&feature=related

I visited her Twitter feed recently and now she focuses on Tweets about her upcoming Comedy Central Roast, which airs this Sunday. Spoiler Alert: Jeffrey Ross is offensive at a roast and he’s the new Tosh. Tune in. #JoePaterNO

I don’t need to know anything about Roseanne’s political platform or the agenda of the Peace & Freedom Party because I’ll never vote for Roseanne the person. Do you know who I would vote for? “Roseanne” the TV show. #dysFUNction

“Roseanne” was one of the first TV shows that dared to show America that not everyone leaves it to beaver. Ha! Beaver. Grow up. It depicted a hard working blue collar family that couldn’t get their shit together but never stopped trying. Sound familiar? Oh hey, that’s America. Our shit is pretty untogether right now, but in a sort of hopeful “we’ll get there eventually,” kind of way. #AmeriCAN

The show dealt with job loss, business openings, business closings, birth control, homosexuality, domestic violence, unwanted pregnancies, obesity, abortion, class, racism, menstruation, and poverty. Maybe America doesn’t address menstruation per se, but there are a lot of old white men who want to tell me when and how I can have my period so that’s basically the same thing. By the way old white men I’ve started tweeting when I’m on my period so follow me there since you need to be in the know (@Jenn_Tisdale) #exclamationpoint

Why the show even had guest stars, just like America! Remember when George Clooney raised $15 million for Obama’s campaign? He played Roseanne’s boss and Jackie’s love interest so he got to be attractive and authoritative just like he is in real life. Editor’s note: We’ve never met but I sense that we would really get along well. #ChiseledGoodLooksMakeForGreatFriends

Here’s the deal, I am awful at politics. I’ll probably be asked to leave D.C. soon for admitting that. What I loved about “Roseanne” and what I can appreciate about Roseanne is the effort and the interest because I seem to be lacking in both. And if you need more of a push then you can always count on patriotism. #TheVoice

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