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Guys, can you even believe I am turning a year older today? (NEITHER CAN I, NEITHER CAN I.) If you’re going, “What do you even mean, Megan? Why would I care if it’s your birthday today or not? Why are you shamelessly self-promoting?” then I’m going, “BYE GURL.”

Okay, FINE, even if you don’t care that it is my birthday (currently accepting all gifts and posi-vibes…) there is PLENTY to celebrate this weekend, INCLUDING THE SEASON THREE PREMIERE OF GIRLS! (Here’s how to emotionally eat your way through that, BTW…) Be sure to consult your weekend horoscope (as dictated by OC GIFs) and then cruise all of the options listed below:

THURSDAY

  • As previously mentioned, it’s my birthday tonight, so whatever you choose to do, YOU’D BETTER HAVE THE MOST FUN BECAUSE I SAID SO. You can start things off at Mercury Lounge where Connan Mockasin will be playing for $12.
  • OR pop on over to the Highline Ballroom instead for tunes by Yuna, Hurray for the Riff Raff and others. Tickets are $25, which is (mostly) doable.
  • But if you want my REAL personal vote, we should all just head to Silent Barn tonight for a BRAIDER (and others) show, which will cost just $7 to attend.
  • Not into that and/or STILL too impoverished? DON’T WORRY; you can hit up good old Brooklyn Bowl instead for an evening with Questlove, who’ll be providing tunes via DJ set for $5.

  • ALSO in the mega-cheap realm tonight is the latest edition of Gelf Magazine’s Varsity Letters, ft. a night about ALL THINGS HOCKEY. (Fingers crossed that that includes The Mighty Ducks.)
  • Of course, free booze never hurt anyone (actually, it probably did BUT WHATEVER), so let’s hit up Citigroup Center for an art opening ft. FREE DRANKS.
  • And if you’re more interested in the process BEHIND making that free booze, hit up Brooklyn Kitchen for a $65 course in homebrewing. You’ll get to sample different brewskies AND take home your own bottle of beer made in class.
  • We can also take it mega-easy with ALL OF THE ROMANCE and ALL OF THE LOLs that is involved in When Harry Met Sally, which is screening at Nitehawk tonight.

FRIDAY

  • First up, let’s just go dance it out over at the Bell House tonight for Head On’s anniversary, ft. Britpop vs. Indie Rock as the theme for the tunes of the evening.
  • Not into those genres? Probably DEFINITELY head to Radio Bushwick for LEFTURNO, which’ll feature a free evening of mega-danceable tunes starting at MIDNIGHT.
  • But loves Yellowbirds like we love Yellowbirds, which is why my feelings are screaming for us to see none other than YELLOWBIRDS over at Mercury Lounge for $10.
  • AND if you decide to stick around for the late show at Mercury Lounge as well (we think you should), then Toy will take the stage after 10:30pm for $12 per ticket.
  • Or if you’ve got an extra five dollars hanging around, you COULD always pop a few blocks over to Bowery Ballroom for a $15 show by Weekend, Vaura and Nothing.
  • We’ve also got Jake Bugg and Albert Hammond Jr. uptown at Terminal 5 tonight, so be sure to grab those tickets now before they’re ALL SOLD OUT and/or increase from $27.50 to $30.

  • If you’re more into electronic tuneage, though, then prepare to fork over $17 for an evening with Sepalcure (among others) at none other than Cameo Gallery this evening.
  • But did you fail to get enough of Connan Mockasin on Wednesday? WELL good news! You’ve got a second chance to catch a show tonight at Glasslands for between $12 and $14.
  • OR if you’re super duper broke, you’ve got a most excellent option in catching a FREE Mac Demarco show over at the Brooklyn Night Bazaar this evening! #YASSSS
  • Trying to branch out from the standard show-going? WELL, there’s always what’s sure to be an inspirational performance of Point Break Live tonight at the Bell House! No that is not a joke!
  • Plus we could always spend our evening with tunes AND comedy thanks to Dave Hill, Har Mar Superstar and MORE for just $10 at Union Hall.
  • But if you’re hungover right now like I am, we should all probably just go watch a Japanese horror flick at Videology, ’cause FREE SAKE IS INVOLVED.

SATURDAY

  • Hi, Saturday is the greatest, and Cardiknox is also the greatest, so YOU should naturally go to Mercury Lounge to catch a live show for $10 per ticket this evening.
  • But let’s face it, Brooklyn > Manhattan, so let’s INSTEAD zip across the Williamsburg Bridge and over to Cameo Gallery, where Gross Ghost will play an $8 show.
  • OR slightly farther afield (read: like five blocks up) we can catch what’s sure to be an ultra-fantastic show by Cloud Control at Rough Trade for a super reasonable $12.
  • Can’t make it to that gig? NO WORRIES, just be sure to swing on over to Baby’s All Right tonight a little bit later, ’cause the band will be there TOO, again for $12.

  • PERSONALLY I think we should all make a beeline for Glasslands where Diane Coffee (Shaun Fleming of Glasslands) will play a $10 show this evening, ’cause I AM OBSESSED WITH THE TUNES.
  • Slash if you continue to be MEGA-POOR this weekend, you’re in luck AGAIN over at the Brooklyn Night Bazaar, ’cause we can jam out to the sunshine grunge that is Imperial Teen fo’ FREE.
  • Not into tunes? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?! Slash just make a beeline for Videology tonight, where they’ll be screening Back to the mother effing Future ALSO for free.
  • If you DO have a little extra pocket change, though, you might prefer a slightly more terrifying screening of Eraserhead at Sunshine Cinema this evening. #FEAR

SUNDAY

  • In what is surely some sort of miracle, we’ve got a NON-sold out Ron Pope show tonight at Bowery Ballroom, so provided we’ve got $20, there are tickets to be had, y’all.
  • Not feelin’ that? Get some serious bang for your buck at Glasslands, where four bands will play for just $10 INCLUDING Big Spiders Back and The Midnight Hollow.
  • But maybe you’re just too tired to bother putting on pants today, in which case you’re in luck! The mother effing NO PANTS SUBWAY RIDE is happening today, and you can join in sans pantalones.
  • It IS, however, pretty chilly out there, so maybe KEEP the pants and instead head to the 6th Annual Cassoulet Cook-Off at Jimmy’s No. 43 instead! $30 gets you ten samples and an alcoholic beverage. BOOM.

  • Or if you’re just too hungover to do any of that stuff, hole up in a warm, dark movie theater! First, you can belatedly celebrate Nic Cage’s birthday at Nitehawk with a brunch screening of Raising Arizona
  • And speaking of Nitehawk, they’ll ALSO be showing Don’t Look Back today, so if you’re a Bob Dylan fan, you will DEFINITELY want to swing by.
  • AND we’ve got Dangerous Liaisons over at Museum of the Moving Image, which is not as good as Dangerous Minds, but still, MICHELLE PFEIFFER FOR THE WIN.
  • Personally I vote we stay in and watch the third season premiere of Girls, partly because there are two back-to-back brand new episodes, but mostly ’cause it involves minimal social interaction fo’ FREE.

WOW SO MUCH STUFF! If I’ve failed to mention something near and dear to your ears, please feel free to tell me ALL ABOUT IT in the comments and/or on Twitter. BYE!

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