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Hello, humans of the internet, and welcome to the kind-of-almost-weekend! Lots to do, though I’m most excited for screenings of mother effing Home Alone at Nitehawk on Saturday and Sunday. And SPEAKING of Nitehawk, I would just like to quickly remind you of yesterday’s announcement for our Goodfellas Film Feast on January the 8th at 7pm; grab tickets before it’s too late!

And now for a very Kevin McCallister-filled BWB:

THURSDAY

  • If Manhattan’s your jam, start the evening off with Cass McCombs at Bowery Ballroom. Tickets are $16 in advance, $18 day of show, so GET ‘EM NOW.
  • OR you could pop on over to the westerly regions and hit up LPR instead; they’ll be hosting a mega-danceable evening with Fred Falke for $12 in advance, $15 day of show. Again, GET ‘EM NOW.
  • As a Brooklynite, though, I’m going to gently urge you all to COME TO ME so we can catch San Fermin over at Music Hall of Williamsburg for just $15.
  • PLUS Glasslands has a TON of solid stuff going on tonight, starting with The Wild Honey Pie’s fourth birthday spectacular featuring Wilsen as the headliner for $12.

  • And after THAT, we can stick around for an 11:30pm and beyond show featuring Girl Unit, which will (again) cost us $12 to attend. #REASONABLE
  • MEANWHILE, there will be a ‘zine launch for Fizz Navigator, a little publication dedicated to all things soda pop. Definitely hit up The Flat for this one, ’cause Au Revoir Simone will be DJ’ing.
  • Or, if you’re a traveler and/or blogger, you may be interested to hear that a startup in DUMBO will entice you with free beer to learn about new high-tech travel guide ideas.
  • And/or if you just wanna DANCE DANCE DANCE on the cheap, probably hit up Baby’s All Right for a $5 evening with Sweater Beats, Obey City and Blackedout.

FRIDAY

  • TONIGHT Kendra Morris and Mother Feather will be playing Mercury Lounge, which is hugely important and only will cost us $12.
  • Or if you happen to have millions of dollars (read: between $22.50 and $45), then Barclays Center wants YOU to go see MGMT this evening for all of the electric feels.
  • PERSONALLY I think we should focus our funds in the direction of Glasslands for Lazerpop, ’cause L-VIS 1990 will be there, and we’ll only have to pay between $10 and $12 to attend.
  • ALSO in the mega-danceable realm, we’ve got Le Bump happening at TBA in Brooklyn, so let’s g-g-go and hear tunes from Mister Disco and Brian Blackout.

  • MEANWHILE back in Manhattan, we’ve got !!! playing over at Webster Hall with Holy Fuck and DJ Stas THEE Boss for an even $20.
  • Let’s get real, though; no one’s tryna pay for ANYTHING tonight, so let’s go BACK to Brooklyn to the BK Night Bazaar for a FREE performance by Small Black, Brothertiger and others.
  • It’s also Videology’s ten year anniversary party, so let’s go and celebrate with food, booze, and most importantly, LOTS OF PRIZES AND STUFF.
  • SPEAKING of movie venues, John Waters’ Female Trouble is playing at MoMA tonight, thus meeting our Divine quota for the week.
  • And lest we forget our spooktacular Friday the 13th options, we’ve got Friday the 13th (naturally) at Sunshine Cinema AND The Shining at IFC Center.

SATURDAY

  • Clearly the first thing we’re going to want to do today is see Home Alone at Nitehawk, because it’ll only be there today and tomorrow and it is SO IMPORTANT THAT WE GO.
  • We can also catch Shame and Hour of the Wolf as part of the INGMAR INSANITY that’s happening over at Lincoln Center this week. Bergman = BEST.
  • If we’re willing to endure our hangovers and trek it out to Port Chester, then we should probably hit up a Tegan and Sara show at Capitol Theatre for $35.
  • If that’s too far out for you, wrangle it in over at Barclays Center tonight for a Queens of the Stone Age show ft. The Kills as the opening act for $37.70.
  • Lips will also be celebrating an album release party with Fielded and Germans at Glasslands tonight, and tickets are a mere $10, so we have NO EXCUSE not to go.

  • PLUS we’ve got what’s likely to be the final Hess Is More performance of 2013 at Baby’s All Right tonight, and the band will be in full live formation. Most excellent.
  • If that ain’t your jam, be glad to know you can spend just $7 to catch Luke Temple live at Church of the Messiah Greenpoint to support COMMON GROUND, which is a homelessness outreach program.
  • AND/OR if you don’t even have $7, you can also hit up the Brooklyn Night Bazaar again tonight for a FREE FREE FREE performance by Diarrhea Planet.
  • It’s also technically worth mentioning that Santa Con is back with a vengeance this year, and while you’ll likely have to pay for SOME stuff, the event itself is free to attend. (Free and horrible.)
  • Etsy will be hosting a slightly less vomit-filled holiday celebration at The Space, where its pop-up for the holidays will feature around forty different vendors.
  • And for even MORE off-the-beaten-path gift ideas, probably hit up the Degenerate Craft Fair over at the DCTV Firehouse, which is also zero dollars until you buy something!

SUNDAY

  • If you aren’t hugely hungover today, and/or you have a family to maintain, probably hit up the kid-friendly Small Black show bright and early (read: before noon) today at Brooklyn Bowl.
  • And if THAT ain’t your jam, most definitely hit up the Ace Hotel lobby for a little performance by Domino Kirke for all of ZERO DOLLARS.
  • PLUS there’s also a free screening of mother effing Free Willy happening at Videology as part of a benefit for Oceana! Like, WHAT?! Amazing.
  • And if you’ve still got some Christmas shopping to do, BUST Magazine will be hosting day TWO of a crafts + food extravaganza on West 18th Street.

  • PLUS you can catch day THREE of Refinery 29’s Tinseltown, a mega-cool holiday market located at 201 Mulberry Street, featuring a DJ set by Matt Hitt of Drowners from 5-7pm.
  • Not into the sound of that? Channel your wallet elsewhere, like the 8-ball Zine Festival at West 32nd Street, where all of your ‘zine dreams will come true!
  • STILL too mainstream for your weirdo taste? Definitely hit up the Morbid Anatomy Craft Fair, which will be taxidermy-filled and terrifyingly excellent.
  • Speaking of terrifyingly excellent, there’s ALSO going to be a screening of Suspiria at Museum of the Moving Image today. DARIO ARGENTO FOR THE WIN.

WOW SO MUCH STUFF! If I’ve failed to mention something here, please feel free to tell me ALL ABOUT IT in the comments and/or on Twitter. BYE!

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