Holy eff, guys, it’s finally here. That’s right, Game of Thrones Season 3 premieres Sunday night on HBO, and despite not owning a television or access to HBO GO, I WILL make it my mission to befriend the right kind of people this weekend. I’m a fairly new Game of Thrones fan; I’ve not read any of the books, and only just started (and finished) watching the show two weeks ago over the course of forty-eight hours. When I’d finished with all twenty hour-long episodes, I felt bad about myself; this was due in part to having wasted an entire weekend in bed watching TV, but mostly because now there was nothing to look forward to for roughly fourteen days. If you’ve waited even longer, I applaud you LOUDLY, and will reward you with our GIF theme du jour, aka GAME OF EFFING THRONES. Here we go:
BEFORE WE START THOUGH: CHECK OUT OUR AWESOME SEASONAL GUIDES we’ve been publishing this week: FILM, MUSIC & STYLE are up now. They are good to go and use for the NEXT 25 WEEKS, so bookmark them and stuff.
ALSO: we now publish weekly, handy guides re: FREE THINGS TO DO IN NYC THIS (AND EVERY) WEEK and AWESOME ART HOUSE AND REPERTOIRE MOVIES NOT TO MISS THIS (AND EVERY) WEEK. Useful!
- Nothing beats a FREE Com Truise DJ set, UNLESS, of course, you add FREE ALCOHOL to the mix. And that is exactly what will be added at WIP (34 Vandam Street) tonight, so get ready to drink a lot lot lot of free vodka.
- Speaking of free booze, we can also head over to powerHouse Arena for the book launch of Kristopher Jansma’s The Unchangeable Spots of Leopards, featuring a reading and what appears to be free whiskey.
- ALTHOUGH, maybe we’d prefer to cool it with all the booze? If that’s the case, let’s consider hitting up a free screening of Gloria at Videology instead.
- And now, please fasten your seat belts because Thursday is CHOCK FULL of live music. For example, first up we’ve got wunderkind Bonzie playing Rockwood Music Hall tonight.
- Or just around the corner we’ve got a show from Hey Marseilles at Mercury Lounge for an even $10.
- That same $10 will ALSO get us in to see another round of Dead Stars this week at Saint Vitus; they’re playing alongside Dichroics and Circle of Buzzards.
- But HOLD THE PHONE, ’cause that $10 will be VERY WELL SPENT if we use it to purchase tickets to Aputumpu Festival at The Studio at Webster Hall tonight; we’re talking Computer Magic, Cultfever, and loads more.
- SPEAKING of Aputumpu Festival, we’ve got another group playing at Cameo Gallery (also $10) featuring Silent Drape Runners, Psychic Twin and Chrome Canyon to name a few.
- Next up we’ve got Jean Grae and others performing at Le Poisson Rouge as part of The Soundtrack Series for ONLY $5 if you snag your tickets in advance; day-of prices SKYROCKET to $8, so get ‘em now.
- PLUS we can stick around for Prince Rama at LPR at 11pm; tickets will run us between $13 and $15 depending on when we buy them.
- But we can ALSO put our money toward an $8 ticket to see Bird Courage, Bill Bartholomew, Vudu Sister and Kennedy at The Rock Shop this evening, which evens out to about $2 a band. (NOT BAD.)
- If you’d like to continue sticking it out in Brooklyn, probably swing by Glasslands for a very affordable $12 show from Gobby and Tezeo tonight.
- Are you getting all offended that I’m giving such low-budget options? WELL, Mr. Moneybags, please consider checking out Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds w/ Sharon Van Etten at Beacon Theatre; this marks the first night of their three-day run, and tickets will cost you between $40 and $70.
- For tickets more in the $20-$30 range, though, we’ve always got The Revival Tour at Irving Plaza, featuring acts like Rocky Votolato and Jenny Owen Youngs.
- It would be unnatural to start off a Friday without a little booze cruise, so let’s head to the NU Hotel for the latest edition of Couch Sessions; Ketel One vodka cocktails will be FREE from 7-8pm to celebrate designers Dee and Ricky’s artistic transformation of the hotel walls. #CREATIVE
- We can also swing by for a few free drinks at Greenlight Bookstore; this will be part of the celebration of Touré’s book I Would Die 4 U: Why Prince Became An Icon, copies of which he’ll be signing while djFRiTZo plays an eff ton of Prince songs. (Literally nothing not to love.)
- But maybe we’re feeling hungry and/or manly, in which case we should go to a free tasting of jerky and beer at Nolita Mart this evening from 6-8pm.
- Musically, let’s head over to Mercury Lounge for Plume Giant and Boy, where tickets will run us a fairly reasonable $15 a pop.
- Or if we feel like splurging again, we can always check out night TWO of Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds plus Sharon Van Etten at Beacon Theatre.
- Also in the semi-splurge category is the Flosstradamus / Para One / DJ Spinz / Alex English show that’s going down at Webster Hall tonight for $30
- Not in your price range? How does $5 sound? We can head over to Glasslands for a live performance by Chrome Sparks (!!!) plus a DJ set by Heathered Pearls. #INCREDIBLE
- For just double that, though, we can ALSO check out Coastgaard, Landlady, The Teen Age, Little Racer, Erica Russo AND Vimes at Pianos. (That’s A LOT of bands for one low price. #MATH)
- OR we could always hit up Arlene’s Grocery for the second Bonzie show this week, which will ALSO only set us back $10.
- I think it’s obvious that we should begin our day at noon sharp for a brunch screening of Girls Just Want to Have Fun at Nitehawk; it’s basically the best movie ever, and there is no way we’re going to miss it, even if it can be purchased for $5 at places like Target.
- But because there is a very real chance we spent all our money on drunk pizza and cabs last night, let’s go ahead and start off on the inexpensive side of things at The Rock Shop for Desert Stars, WIM and more, all for just $8.
- OR we could also hit up Glasslands for a very reasonable, very worthwhile Mister Lies show, tickets for which will only set us back $2 more.
- Not into Brooklyn hangouts? Let’s move up $2 in price again and head over to a $12 Hollis Brown show at Mercury Lounge instead.
- If for some reason our finances are still intact, though, let’s go ahead and catch the third and final night of Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds w/ Sharon Van Etten at Beacon Theatre.
- We can ALSO head to The Bell House for round two of The Revival Tour, again featuring Rocky Votolato and Jenny Owen Youngs among others.
- OR we could just grab a drink at Living Room and stick around for Bonzie’s third and final NYC show at 7pm.
- If we’re trying to get drunk on the cheap tonight, though, we’re in luck; Cheeky Bastard’s going down at Yotel, and we can count on an hour of free vodka from 10-11pm, plus free music all night long with RSVP.
- First things first: HAPPY EASTER, Y’ALL! Let’s Cadbury-egg houses and cars and explode Peeps in the microwave and get CUH-RAY-ZAYYYYY.
- Next, let’s get over to Nitehawk for the second brunch screening of Girls Just Want to Have Fun this weekend! (Sarah Jessica Parker’s aura will fill us with light and strength to take on the White Walkers later tonight when we watch Game of Thrones.)
- OR if we’d prefer an Austrian-style Easter brunch (because why not?!) let’s head over to the Seasonal ($59/pp) or Edi & the Wolf ($39/pp.) MMMMMMMMM SPÄTZLE.
- Today’s fairly low-key in the way of shows, but that’s cool, because we will have no trouble deciding to hit up a $10 Christina Courtin performance at Mercury Lounge. BOOM.
- But let’s be real; the only important thing happening today is the premiere of the third season of Game of Thrones, so let’s just head over to Videology’s TV night for a free screening, because even if we own televisions, we probably don’t have HBO. #PRACTICAL
- SPEAKING of Game of Thrones viewing parties, Halyards jumped on the bandwagon, too; they’ll host trivia starting at 8pm, plus there’ll be a live screening, bingo, drink specials and PRIZES!
- And to round out our GoT viewing options, we could ALSO head over to Lola BKLYN, where they’ll be screening the episode and will obviously have food and drink on hand, too.
- But maybe you get super emotional during Game of Thrones like I do and you don’t feel like sobbing in public? In that case, I vote we head to the Bell House for Tell Your Friends! Spring Fling! instead, so we can LOL with Janeane Garofalo or whatever.
WOW SO MUCH STUFF! If I forgot to include something, it’s just because I’m so nervous that Sam got eaten by the White Walkers that I got distracted. SO, feel free to tell me via the comments, on Twitter (@BYTNYC), and/or with four blows of the horn to let me know that it’s not rangers or wildlings or White Walkers approaching, but instead an important event you need to share. BYE!