We all wish animals could talk. At least everyone who watched The Wild Thornberrys feels that way (or Dr. Dolittle, I guess). Well, thanks to Twitter, our childhood dreams can come true with novelty twitter accounts that assume the personas of animals, from sloths to squirrels.
Sloths have gained a huge Internet “following” in recent months, whether people find them cute or absolutely terrifying or both. So in this popularity have come numerous Twitter accounts that say they are sloths. My personal favorite is Sloth, which is linked to above. It’s basically just a sloth being sassy and kind of an asshole. Example: “are you a deer because I’m going to run you over.” Also: “my favorite sex position is turning off the lights and going to sleep.”
It’s literally just the words that describe the actions of a common squirrel. “Run, run, run,” “stare,” etc. I mean, it sounds boring but I think it’s kind of hilarious that something some simple as gained over 100,000 followers. The Internet is a wonderland.
Just a crab, bein’ a crab, tweetin’ about being a crab. But he isn’t humble; he’s kind of a dick. “I haven’t got a nose ‘how do you smell?’ I hear you are asking me. I can’t I just said I have no nose you assnugget.” But to be frank, I kind of assumed crabs would be awful if they had the ability to speak because they just look like it (besides that whole “being crabby” thing).
I will never understand Horse ebooks, maybe you can explain it to me but it’s massively popular and it’s nonsense. Here’s an example: “I wanted, and enabled me to be in accordance with him in that pyramid which he appears.” I’m sorry, but what? Someone please explain it to me! Despite my massive confusion, it’s hilarious at times because of the complete incoherence of the tweets.