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Once upon a time, I had a radio show that only played bands currently performing in the District. That show is super dead, so we’ve resurrected it (with way more words and far less radio) in the form of this column. Every day I’ll review a song from a band playing in D.C. that night. The rules are, 1. I can only listen to the song once and 2. I only have until the end of the song to finish my review.


Are any of these people even teens? They look like adults. I would serve them alcohol. Also, the name The Velvet Teen grosses me out. I feel like it has weird Lolita connotations and I don’t know why. Actually, I think I do know why. It’s probably because velvet has a strange sexual connotations because it’s… soft? I don’t know. I gave it my best shot. This song is okay. I’m not very excited about it. I’m more interested in talking about the sexuality of different fabrics. I feel like suede would be asexual.

You can see The Velvet Teen tonight at DC9.