Now I know we’re in the dead of January here and I do love a bitter cold winter. BUT it’s about this time that I really miss some OUTSIDE BEERS.
It’s never too early to prepare for drinking outside.
How’s about we go through the ABCs of crucial beer equipment & tips you’ll be needing any time of year.
✖ ATTITUDE ✖
You’re going to need a solid vessel.
✖ BACKPACKING ✖
Beer and backpacking can be tricky. Here are some options to tackle your thirst on top of Everest.
– This genius guy named Pat created a carbonator bottle and some concentrated beer packs. Probably tastes terrible on your couch but the best beer you’ve ever dropped down your gullet after 15 miles up a mountain and a bear fight:
– Throw a Beeracuda around your neck to save some pack space.
– F all those bulky pack stoves:
✖ COOKING ✖
– Beer Mac & Cheese. THIS IS NOT A JOKE. Google it.
– Later, fish scales.
– Drop a marshmallow in that stout.
✖ CLEAN CAMP ✖
– Reach for some beer soap and clean off all those dog hairs.
– You can use beer to put out your fire.
✖ HOLDING ✖
But I would avoid frat camp and stick with this bear face:
Or just a soup can on a stick:
✖ KILLING ✖
Now if things get dark out in the woods, you can always fashion a quick arrow or two from those empties.
✖ OPENING ✖
This is where things get important. Take notes.
– While your dog sits idle waiting for you to make that fatal mistake, put him to good use.
– Bottle opener that reseals your beer. MY WYOMING COWBOY DAD APPROVED.
– With your knife
– Hire this guy
✖ STORAGE ✖
I’ve had this problem before. Not too long ago I was camping outside Cody, Wyoming when I witnessed a cowboy drop a downed tree across a small river. That tree would play river goalie all night preventing his beers from a watery escape and keeping them ice cold. I relive this memory every day.
– Next best thing. Fish net.
– Your Kayak isn’t doing shit right now.
✖ XYLOPHONING ✖
Till next time, campers.