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It’s that time of year again: Scorpio birthday season. And since Scorpios just looove to celebrate their birthday, it’s time we bring you the best happy hours that will keep your Scorpio friends happy. Of course, we all know these are the friends that will require an extra eye on them, especially during a time for celebration. While no one can really agree on whether or not pouring alcohol on a scorpion will actually make it sting itself to death, let’s all approach birthday season with an air of caution regardless. Scorpios know how to party.

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Mr. Henry’s – This Capitol Hill bar has happy hour from 4 p.m. – 7 p.m., 10 p.m. – midnight every day. But what makes them perfect for a birthday celebration is that the happy hour features the Scorpio spirit drink. That’s right, a shot of Fireball is only $5.

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Madhatter – Okay, you can always get the Hatter’s Punch for $33 when there’s a group of you going out. …But everyone knows your Scorpio friend will just drink the whole thing with three straws in their mouth because they think no one is looking. Better to head to the Madhatter on Thursday night when Miller Lite drafts are just $1.

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Bar Charley – Since Scorpios tend to hide their feelings sober, getting some booze in them will usually be cause for some tears that they’ve been holding back. Bar Charley is pretty hidden from street view and has plenty of tables you all can cry at without too many people noticing. Happy hour is 4 – 6:30pm on Tuesdays with $6.95 PEI Mussels with Schlitz and Tasso Ham.

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Red Derby – It’s no secret that Scorpios love the attention to be on them so if it’s your birthday Scorpio feel free to call ahead at Red Derby in Columbia Heights and request a birthday cake be made. Wow! How did that get there! Happy hour is every day from 5 p.m. – 8 p.m., $1 off everything behind the bar.

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Boundary Stone – Boundary Stone the perfect spot for Scorpios who love a party that never ends. This public house is open from 11 a.m. – 3 a.m. on Friday and Saturday, and until 2 a.m. every other day of the week. Happy hour is 4 p.m. – 7 p.m. Monday – Thursday, where you can get a $3 can of Narragansett Lager, $5 rail drinks, and $5 wings.

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