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Haiku is a noun that is the same in both the singular and plural.

Sometimes (always) the news is depressing and/or boring, but you know what isn’t depressing OR boring? Guessing games.

So, here are five haiku about some of the most talked-about news stories of the past few days. You guess what the hell I’m talking about. Things were particularly dismal this week, so I apologize in advance.

Want your favorite (most awful) news story translated into an evocative and atmosphere piece of Japanese poetry? Email me .

What my performance art and entertainment group, The Haiku Guys to write original haiku at your next office party/event/festival/bar mitzvah/bachelorette? Email us.

evil monster germs
emerging from your nightmares
at least it’s not bees
after the eighth time
do we still need to report?
makes greece look prudent
(argentina’s debt default)
i am not convinced
relieved for the time being
wait for shoe to drop
(israel/palestine cease-fire)
even the cheapskates
know highways are too pricey
build railroads instead
(rising road taxes across the u.s.)
we all have the urge
must prove that we have faces
we are all monkeys
(monkey selfies and copyrights)