A password will be e-mailed to you.

Haiku is a noun that is the same in both the singular and plural. Sometimes, ‘haiku’ can even be a verb.

This week, all haiku are about old men, completely by chance. Fancy that.

You should tweet these haiku, it will be fun!

if you didn’t know
monarchy is still not dead
but the king sure is

(king abdullah of saudi arabia dies at ninety)

when you’re eighty-one
and you’ve seen what i have seen
then maybe we’ll talk

(longest serving senator, octogenarian orrin hatch is named president pro tempore – third in line for presidency)

a difficult stance
between blade and sharper place
now lies the word “no”

(shinzo abe and japanese government refuses demands for two japanese held hostage)

if by accident
you break off the pharaoh’s beard
please don’t use elmers

(conservationists attempt to quickly fix 3k+ year old King Tut’s mask, use crappy glue, everyone notices)

ah, iniquity.
how can we deal with this thing?
fighting beasts we built.

(bill gates speaks about philanthropy and inequality in society)

Want your favorite (most controversial) news story translated into an evocative and atmospheric piece of Japanese poetry? Email me.

Want my performance art and entertainment group, The Haiku Guys to write original haiku at your next office party/event/festival/bar mitzvah/bachelorette? Email us.