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Don’t forget, y’all! We have 6 months and spare change until the end of the world. AS. WE. KNOW. IT. Thanks a lot, Mayans.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve already begun tying my loose ends so I’m not rushing around (ON TOP OF JUST-IN-CASE HOLIDAY SHOPPING), ashamed of all those things I didn’t get done.

Don’t let this happen to you! So before someone yells “Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice!” and we’re just totally wiped out, make sure you get started on every gay-specific thing you should do.

I’m giving you six whole months to get this done! Puh-lenty of time. Good luck, and don’t fuck it up.

01) Take the ultimate versatile shopping trip.

02) Find the love of your short life.

03) Go back and nicely apologize to those you hurt in the past.

04) Exercise like crazy, because you don’t wanna look a mess on your last day on Earth.

05) Take time to remember how far you’ve come (a/s/l?).

06) Finally get that tattoo you’ve been wanting.

07) Finally, use these final months to let loose and just be yourself. We’re almost there, you guys!!

All right, now. Get started. You’ve been warned.