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Award shows are meaningless. Trophies awarded for arbitrary reasons is not a good way to view an artists’ work. But they sure are fun! People get dressed up in fancy dresses, people that aren’t orators speak on the biggest stage they’ll ever have and Ricky Gervais will make everyone uncomfortable. They’re great. Since the Emmy’s are coming up and since Tracy Morgan is coming back, we decided to look at some potential future EGOT (Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, Tony) award winners.

Al Pacino 3/4 complete

Al Pacino has got the triple play when it comes to the acting portion of the EGOT. He’s got a Tony, Emmy, and Oscar so only his lack of pursuing anything musical would keep him from the coveted Grammy. I don’t think his previous non participation in anything musical should keep him from winning one and I propose he make an album called Pacino Sings the Hits!

Instead of song standards, Pacino does songs based off lines from his hit films! Pair him up with any big name songwriter and get him to sing (hell he could even talk the tracks Shatner style and this would be a success) such songs as “Attica, Attica, Attica,” “This Whole Trial is Out of Order,” “Say Hello to my Little Friend (the ballad of Tony Montana), “Forget About It (a duet with Robert Deniro), and my favorite I just made up is a collaboration with Ice T’s Body Count called “You’re Gonna Fuckin Die Big Time.” -Goodrich Gevaart


Trey Parker and Matt Stone 3/4 complete

On the relatively short list of people who already have an Emmy, a Golden Globe, and a Tony (and also lacking an Academy Award to complete the EGOT quadfecta), a pair of names prominently stand out from the list: Trey Parker and Matt Stone. South Park has consistently put out great episodes for almost twenty years. There’s a very good chance that if the duo could retire from TV, they could put out a movie worthy of the Academy’s highbrow standards. On one hand, it seems unlikely given their career founded on fart jokes and poking fun at Mormons… on the other, when considering the wild success of that career, it seems only natural they would win an Oscar. If they cared, that is. -Jonny Grave


Neil Patrick Harris 3/4 complete

Neil Patrick Harris has locked his EGOT down. Show business loves this quadruple threat and he doesn’t disappoint. Just start dipping everything in gold and whipping it at his non-aging head. Harris has Emmys under his belt like Batman has smoke bombs. He won for a Guest Actor on Glee back in 2010 and three wins for hosting the Tonys. Speaking of which, Harris received a 2014 Tony Award for his performance in Hedwig and the Angry Inch – Best Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role in a Musical. This was inevitable. Now since the Tonys and Grammys go hand in hand, Hedwig won a Grammy for Best Musical Revival that same year. The O is always the hard one. Neil didn’t get a nod for his role in Gone Girl, but show business really wants to give him one, so its only a matter of time. Harris isn’t going anywhere. -David Carter


Stephen Colbert 2/4 complete

Stephen Colbert, everyone’s favorite ex-fake conservative pundit, earned his E & G during his nearly decade long reign on The Colbert Report. In 2010, Stephen won the Grammy Award for Best Comedy Album for A Colbert Christmas. In 2013, The Colbert Report won two Emmys, one for Outstanding Variety Series and one for Outstanding Writing for a Variety Series, breaking The Daily Show’s streak. Some can claim that he won his first Emmy with The Daily Show cast when he was a correspondent, and they would be right, but which Emmy would you put on a higher shelf? As for a Tony, I believe he could pull that trigger anytime he wanted, if he had any time to be a part of a Broadway production. He has a musical theater background, a public love of Sondheim, and even appeared in Sondheim’s Company with the New York Philharmonic and our next potential EGOT, in 2011. The problem is, with his new CBS mantle I doubt he would have time to write a show, nevermind star in one, so Colbert’s way in would be getting a T for producing. As for the Oscar, all he needs to do is play a supporting role in one movie, a part he could shoot over a week, and watch it win. His old Second City buddy, Steve Carell almost beat him to it with his 2015 Oscar nod. -David Carter


Adele 2/4 complete

My mom has pretty good music taste, but most of it is stuff that I’ve played for her. For instance, she loves Vampire Weekend but would she have found them on her own? Probably not. Adele however, my mom found completely on her own and is fairly obsessed with. Adele’s album 21 (which won SEVEN Grammy’s! SEVEN!), was played so much in our house I think it is permanently stuck in our CD player. Adele’s music and talent has the ability to transcend generations. That sort of broad appeal isn’t something that happens often, and with her 2013 Best Original Song Oscar for Skyfall she’s already halfway to her EGOT at the ripe old age of 27. Especially if she goes through another bad break up, (21 was famously based on a former relationship gone sour) and they decide to make a Broadway show/HBO special out of it? She’ll be set. -Marissa Rubenstein


Justin Timberlake 2/4 complete

JT’s already halfway there- he’s got nine Grammys, four Emmys and a whole bunch of other awards that are irrelevant to his qualifying for EGOT. We’ve already seen him dabble in film (he was fine in The Social Network, admit it!) and every time he hosts SNL or shows up on Late Night, we know it’s going to be an absolute banger. The guy’s got style, presence and insane likability factor. He just seems like a nice dude who works hard and is also is very good at everything. However, likability isn’t going to get him an EGOT. All he needs to do is launch that stage career (not a far stretch, he’s got the chops and we’ve all seen the “Bye Bye Bye” music video) and get one breakout film role and he’s in! I’m just as shocked as you are that Bad Teacher wasn’t the one to get him that O. -Tam Sackman


Taye Diggs 2/4 complete, kinda

Taye Diggs is the most recent actor to step into the VERY TALL heels of Hedwig (and the Angry Inch) on Broadway though he’s no stranger to the stage. Recall if you will he got his start in the ORIGINAL cast of RENT which was way more than five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes ago. While Diggs himself did not win a Tony, the production itself did and there is already some Tony buzz around his Hedwig performance. His television and film resume, while slightly less impressive, is still no small potatoes. He’s been involved in some notable shows such as Private Practice, a Grey’s Anatomy spinoff and some less notable films such as The Best Man. The promise is there, however. His performance in the film adaptation of Chicago was delightful (is this cheating? a musical-turned-movie that won an Oscar) and I really think his turn as Hedwig is going to let folks know just how far Diggs can stretch as an actor. Give him a few years…the awards will come rolling in. If anything he’ll definitely get an award for following EVERYONE ON TWITTER. Can you Diggs it? Yes you can.-Jenn Tisdale


Brian Eno 1/4 complete

Brian Eno is an incredibly talented guy…like a bald, chill, British version of Mark Motherbaugh, just waiting for Wes Anderson to ask him to score a movie.

He’s already won some Grammys, but not for his own music. (He produced a bunch of albums for U2, including The Joshua Tree, which is…fine.) He basically invented ambient music. And his albums sound like soundtracks anyway. Really, I’m surprised he hasn’t already knocked out a few more of the EGOT awards.

At the very least, I’d like to see a movie/tv show/musical about his life. He’s a super important figure in music history AND in the 70s he looked like Riff Raff from Rocky Horror so it would probably be pretty awesome. Imagine a Mama Mia-like musical featuring only songs by Brian Eno. HERE COME THE WARM JETS of my tears because this is a beautiful idea and someone should get on it. -Kalee Rinehart


Jesse Eisenberg 0/4 complete

Jesse Eisenberg, the neurotic actor who stars in the new American Ultra, will won an EGOT. The Emmy, Oscar, and Tony are the easier part. Eisenberg is an accomplished actor, both on stage and screen, and it’s inevitable that a few roles will capture the attention of those respective voting bodies (in addition to Ultra and The End of the Tour, Eisenberg also stars this year in Louder than Bombs, the American debut from Danish filmmaker Joachim Trier). The trickier part is the Emmy, and I think Eisenberg will win through his spoken word efforts. He’s written articles for McSweeny’s and The New Yorker. He’s written well-received off-Broadway plays. Like other actors who have received nominations Spoken Word work, I’m sure Emmy voters will recognize as his neurotic charm, then proceed accordingly. Eisenberg just needs to got a tad more ambitious, writing some brilliant prose and then he’s good to go (we already know he can). Will he be the only EGOT winner to star in stoner comedy? All signs point to yes. -Alan Zilberman


Tracy Morgan 0/4 complete

The man that played the character that coined the term, Tracy Morgan is coming back into the spotlight after a horrific accident last year. The beloved performer will host SNL October 17. It would not be surprising if that episode was nominated for an Emmy. It would not be surprising if it won. It would not be surprising if he wrote a book about his horrific accident and valiant recovery and that book will most likely need an audio version and that will most likely be nominated and win an Grammy. And that book could lead to a documentary or bio pic. And that will most likely be nominated and win an Academy Award. And then he’ll read the phone book on Broadway and win a Tony. -Brandon Wetherbee


The Cast of Under The Dome 4/4 complete

The entire cast of Under The Dome, a show constantly threatening to become too boring to hatewatch, are perhaps the entertainment industry’s greatest hope of collectively snagging an EGOT. In fact, if you look closely, they already have:
-Season Three regular Marg Helgenberger already won an Emmy 25 years ago for her work on China Beach, so that’s your E.
-Season Two guest star Dwight Yoakam won a Grammy Award in 1994 for Best Country Vocal Performance by a Male for his rendition of “Ain’t That Lonely Yet” on his album This Time. Hell yeah. Grammy.
-The spectre of Pauline Verdreaux Rennie, looms large over much of the cast of Under The Dome, she was Big Jim’s wife, Junior’s mom, Sam’s sister and everyone thought she was dead. Her sudden appearance outside the dome in Season Two was a startling reveal. What’s more startling is if you shave off the little tail hanging out on the bottom right corner of the letter “Q”, it looks a lot like an “O”. Sherry Stringfield, who plays Pauline on the show, took home a Q Award (the household name for the Viewers for Quality Television Awards) in 1995 AND 1996 for Best Actress in Quality Drama Series for her role as Dr. Susan Lewis on ER. Q with shaved tail equals O and we’re almost there.
-And of course, Julia Shumway herself, intrepid reporter turned audience mouthpiece/voice of reason on the show, Rachelle Lefevre took home a Teen Choice Award in 2009 for Choice Movie Villain for her turn as Victoria Sutherland in The Twilight Saga: New Moon. There’s your T.

EGOT. Emmy. Grammy. Q. Teen Choice. EGOT. The cast of Under The Dome is an EGOT and nobody’s even TALKING about it. -Matt Byrne