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Two pieces of good news for you, reader: (1) The coolest, most legendary comedy show in a bar ever is back, and more ladylike than ever! Three Chord Comedy! (now hosted by Hillary Buckholtz, fabulous stand-up comedian and purveyor of jaw-breakingly cheesy nostalgia on her nostalgia site I’m Remembering) the funniest happy hour in town returns this Friday starring Andy Haynes (who was just on Fallon), Scott Moran, and a bevy of local glorious alt.comedy nerds. (2) In celebration, we asked Andy and Scott, who happens to be his roommate up in New York, to interview each-other by email. Even though they are probably sick of each other, they managed to keep it together long enough to chat about passive aggressive notes, the boredom of being on TV and how fast Obama can drive.

On Thu, Nov 4, 2010 at 2:10 PM, Andy Haynes <[email protected]> wrote:

Hey Scott,

I hate to disrupt Call of Duty: Modern Warfare at full volume, but we’ve got that Bright Young Things [sic] interview to promote our show in DC. Let’s just shoot questions back and forth over this, the internet.

Question #1: What’s your favorite thing about doing comedy in America’s capital?

Also could you stop playing that game for a minute and start playing Call of Duty: Wash Your Fucking Dishes, and then beat the level turn down the volume, I’m gonna have Post Dramatic Stress Syndrome if you keep it up.


PS. When I take a large BM, I refer to it as Call of Doody.

On Thu, Nov 4, 2010 at 2:51 PM, scott moran <[email protected]> wrote:

Hey Andy

Not sure if you’ve ever been to war or not, it’s loud. I’m sorry for having to share a real fact so early in the email. I would love to play Dishes game you mentioned, where can I find a copy? In a 100% unrelated topic, are you still the president of The Passive Aggressive Roomates Association of America?

As for stand-up in DC, my favorite part is spending time at the Smithsonian during the day and of course maybe getting to see the presidential motorcade speed around. I love how fast Barack gets to drive, cause he drives! Also, the 5 or 6 times I’ve performed in DC, have been fun, the crowds seem to appreciate a good time.

How about you? You started doing stand-up in DC, and then moved to Seattle which is where we met and ultimately decided to be room mates in NYC.  How would you compare DC to Seattle?  NYC?

On Thu, Nov 4, 2010 at 3:22 PM, Andy Haynes <[email protected]> wrote:


Funny you ask. I AM still the President of the PARAA, I’m also a member. Kind of like how you are the President and only member of KDNS, or King of Dickheads Named Scott. You guys must be hurting for members, too bad there can only be one king. Is it lonely on the top? Is your Dickhead castle full of dirty dishes?

I always have loved doing stand up . The audiences are more diverse, smart, and open-minded than anywhere else I’ve performed. I like Seattle alright, cause it’s home, but DC seems to be the perfect storm, mainly cause George Clooney is there. Really though I think its the government; people move to DC to work in government or non-profs, so they’re kind of dorks, but cool dorks, like the Winklevaus twins. Oh, and New York is a monster that will kidnap your dreams.

Hey you produce a lot of shows, in a lot of different venues, do you prefer going to comedy clubs or the indie comedy shows?”


PS. I need the TV tonight for Modern Family.

On Thu, Nov 4, 2010 at 3:54 PM, scott moran <[email protected]> wrote:

I’ll make you a deal, if you stop farting up the livingroom… I’ll head into the kitchen when I’m done typing this and throw all of the dishes into the garbage can, since none of them are actually yours to complain about and I don’t care about them. Deal?

I like both. I produce a couple of indie comedy shows in NYC so I do spend a lot of time in them, but I do enjoy the club scene as well.  As a comedian it pays off to be good in both but I would say overall I like the indie scene a little more because it feels like anything can happen.  In clubs you have to buy a 2 drink minimum and at an indie comedy show you have to drink PBR.

Andy, answer me this.  You were on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon this year… How has this impacted your career?


On Thu, Nov 4, 2010 at 4:19 PM, Andy Haynes <[email protected]> wrote:

I like that deal, cause I don’t like those dishes anyways. We should just use styrofoam anyways, cause when the Tea Party finally takes over, they’re going to make recycling illegal, and corn dogs mandatory.

The Fallon thing has been good, because it validates my asshole attitude that much more, but really it just lets me focus on comedy, more than working as hard to get booked. Also I have to turn down unsolicited BJs like ALL DAY LONG. It’s taxing, but no one said being a comedy hero is a part time job.

I think that’s enough questions, besides, we only have one minute till reggae music time.

Thanks for interviewing me Scott, you’re the best roommate a guy could wish for, if that guy wished for shitty things.

ANDY – Comedy Hero.

On Thu, Nov 4, 2010 at 3:54 PM, scott moran <[email protected]> wrote:

One last thing…

Any party that makes corn dogs mandatory has my vote. Also, it has been my pleasure emailing back and forth with you as we sit here on the floor beside each other  in our couch-less livingroom.  We’ve made it.