WHEREIN: We bring you the developments (happening in and around DC) that we think are newsworthy, or, at the very least, almost newsworthy…
- Another man jumped the White House fence AND PUNCHED TWO DOGS IN THE FACE LIKE A GOD DAMN PSYCHOPATH. (DCist)
- A new independent bookstore is opening in Petworth. (NBC)
- Energy efficiency in D.C. is improving. (DCist)
- Hannibal Buress is facing major backlash after acknowledging that Bill Cosby was accused of sexual assault by multiple people. (Huffington Post)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MrWoEgBw610 - The substitute teacher who sexually assaulted a student is pleading not-guilty, despite of the video evidence and texts she sent that say otherwise. (Washington Post)
- Metro indecent exposure reports are rising. (DCist)

via Metro
- Metro track work continues to make life confusing, everything ends, existence is meaningless, etc. (DCist)
- Ben Bradlee’s funeral will be open to the public. (Washington Post)
- Concealed carry permits are now available in D.C. (NBC)
- Uber is delivering free flue shots today. (FOX)
- The D.C. voter guide was “a complete fiasco.” (Washington Post)
- A toddler got himself stuck in a toy vending machine. (FOX)