WHEREIN: We bring you the developments (happening in and around DC) that we think are newsworthy, or, at the very least, almost newsworthy.
- Let’s get the icky out of the way first. 54 year old Lawrence Joynes, a Montgomery County music teacher, is being charged with  “14 counts of sex abuse of a minor, one count of sex offense in the third degree, child abuse and second-degree rape.” These charges came to light after he was arrested in March for child pornography. Heads up, smiling in a mugshot is never ok, especially when its for this kind of gross. (via WJLA)
- Now that that’s out of the way, in news that doesn’t suck, the recent rise in rats just means that it really and truly is summer! Apparently, rats like bumping uglies in March, so by the summer, they’re out looking for food, and homes, and jobs, I guess, maybe? So maybe be a little less disgusted when you see our not-plague carrying, but still pretty gross neighbors. That’s kind of good news, right? (via Washington Post)
- In sports news, RG3 wants to play in the preseason, but head coach Mike Shanahan is having none of that. No means no, RG. (via CBS Sports)
- Even the president has crappy healthcare. Last week, the presidential motorcade was a little light, missing the customary presidential ambulance. The reason for the ambulance’s absence? It had run out of gas. Ready yourself for conspiracy theories. (via Washington Times)
- Don’t you wish summer could just last forever? Well, maybe not real summer, but how you expect summer to be. So do our friends at Gordy’s Pickle Jar. They’ve launched a new blog, and it is chock-full of food, events and pictures of all the things that make summer worthwhile. Eternal summer, indeed. (via Gordy’s Pickle Jar)
- And finally, as if DC wasn’t already cool enough, you can now host your sleepovers at the Natural History Museum, National Zoo, and the National Aquarium. Now if somebody says you’ll be sleeping with the fishes, you should just assume they’re inviting you out to a night of fun at the aquarium! (via In The Capital)

Pictured: The smile of a friend