WHEREIN: We bring you the developments (happening in and around D.C.) that we think are newsworthy, or, at the very least, almost newsworthy:

• Pi Pizzeria is giving away FREE PIZZA to journalists today because they keep getting the emotional, and now physical, shit kicked out of them. (via Twitter)
• Someone call Anne Rice because D.C. finally has its own vampire! (via WJLA)

• College campuses are becoming even MORE bigoted/violent. Sigh. (via WAMU)
• This just in: Christian school being shitty towards a pregnant girl! CRAZY IF TRUE. (via Washington Post)

• Hungover at Union Station, about to get on a bus/train? Soon you can drown yourself in CAVA. (via City Paper)
• Speaking of food (always)…Chinatown is getting a new Indian restaurant! (via Popville)

>>>>>>>>>>>> Here is a Featured Event >>>>>>>>>>>>

Friday 11/03

Jak Knight @ DC Improv Lounge

$17

The Seattle native has been getting notice for both his writing (on "Lucas Brothers Moving Company" and more) and his stand-up, appearing in the Oddball Comedy festival and opening for some big-time stars. He's got a stand-up special and an animated Netflix show in the works ... so catch him now, on his way up.

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Tickets>>

>>>>>>>>>>>> Ok, back to the article! >>>>>>>>>>>>

• Here are the best times to leave for Memorial Day. Hint: now. (via NBC4)