WHEREIN: We bring you the developments (happening in and around D.C.) that we think are newsworthy, or, at the very least, almost newsworthy:
- I’m sure you’ve all heard about Paul Ryan by now, right?
- Khloe Kardashian’s boyfriend was caught on tape with another woman in an Arlington club. It’s now the most exciting thing to ever happen in Arlington.

Same, Khloe. Same.
- In super crazy news, a man impersonating a police officer handcuffed an actual police officer at the Foggy Bottom Whole Foods. The impersonator also yelled at the real cop to, “stop resisting.” That’s not a joke. That’s a real thing that happened.
- In other crazy news, a Virginia man that had been charged with possessing weed, brought weed to his court appearance. Virginia is the Florida of the DMV.
- Metro is breaking into the 21st century and will allow mobile payments in 2019.
- The D.C. Council questions Asimov’s three laws of robotics and debates whether or not robots have rights. Kind of.
- Here’s a little more info about the three floor Mexican restaurant that the folks behind Ambar are opening in Clarendon.
- Speaking of Mexican food, Taco Bamba creates the ultimate food sin with their burger / taco / devil spawn combination. I love you guys, don’t break my heart like this.
- It’s National Pet Day! Look at some dogs.