Tears and queers! Honey this weeks episode was a must see! The ladies started Crying and after watching Alyssa Edwards facials this week… I was dying… But it’s true what they say you do have to laugh through the tears!
Post Ivy Winters elimination the gals walk back to the workroom where yet again Coco and Jinx Monsoon have words. It looks like it’s pageant queen vs comedy queens this episode and I don’t know about you readers but my money is on the comedy queens… That’s all.
BooHoo- girl you got She-mail!
As the gals gather a bunch of folding chairs in a circle it reminds me plenty of AA meetings that I have desperately tried to avoid- although, let’s be honest. Those meetings always have the best donuts and coffee… I’m just saying!
The crying game has begun. This mini challenge calls upon the girls share a story and shed a tear. Most of the stories are mediocre with the exception of Jinkx Monsoon who is hamming it up, Alyssa Edwards who is spinning a decent tale and my gal pal Detox who is giving us a little insight into the darker side of her past.
It turns out the Ru was touched by Detox’s story and Alyssa’s ability to spin a good yarn and announces these two queens as winners of the challenge. And much to Alyssa’s dismay it is yet again another acting challenge… Poor gal! But wait there’s a twist it’s not just any acting challenge these ladies are putting on a Telenovela! Escandalo!!!
Main Challenge – Telenovela!
Ro-Laska-Tox is back together and Alaska is not amused! She is over the whole clique thing (C’Mon Alaska all the cool queens are doing it!) Over on team Alyssa mutiny is afoot. Alyssa is a raiding Jinkx’s wardrobe in which – no Tea no Shade – they are not the same size. Beside all the fat jokes that come to mind her inability to act is just the icing on the cake.
On the set We are joined by acting coaches Ru and Maria Conchita Alonso along with the leading man Wilmer Valderrama ( that 70’s Show). Both teams do a decent job but Jinkx is really hitting it home! For those of you at home who would like to get a little intoxicated during this segment I suggest taking a shot every time Coco forgets her line or if you’d like take a shot every time Alyssa cannot produce an orgasm correctly. Just don’t spit out your Absolut Cosmo when you see Jinx dry hopping the Form Decor furniture… It burns shooting out of your nose!
RuPaul cha-chas down the runway in a fierce flowing gown and welcomes our judges to this weeks caliente episode of drag race! Santino and Michelle join special guest judges Maria Conchita Alonso and Jamie-Lynn Sigler. Tonight’s runway theme is Latina Glamarosa Eleganza!
Detox– Serving big pink piñata realness
Roxxxy Andrews – Oh she is giving me Revenge of the Spanish Wench!
Alaska – ha! Cheesy ChaCha Conga line Realness …
Alyssa Edwards – Ay dios mio! What Were You Thinking?!
Coco Montrese – I wish she would have put a bowl of fruit on her head it was have completed this look.
Jinkx Monsoon – Okay girl, with that Day of the Dead skeleton look, you better pull Sharon Needles!
Judgment and videos
We watch Team Detox’s video first and I got to say it’s rather entertaining all the girls in my opinion and did a great job. I’m not sure what the judges are talking about. This being said we move on to Team Alyssa.
This was a big train wreck the only shining star is Jinkx Monsoon comedic timing. We go on to reading the gals on their costumes. Michelle is not in love with Detox’s Pink Sombrero. There’s no pleasing some people. Santino completely shreds Alyssas cha-cha dress calling this the worst fashion mistake of all five seasons. Now I think that’s stretching it I mean come on now! Jinkx gets praise in both wardrobe and performance and is very obviously the winner of this weeks challenge. This leaves us with the ultimate showdown… The one lip-sync for your life that has been anticipated all season long… Alyssa vs. Coco!
They battle to my phone favorite song on the world and Paula Abdul’s Coldhearted Snake. Girl may I tell you this lip-synch was the mother fucking T! And in the end we have to say farewell to Alyssa Edwards and you know as much as I have nitpick on her looks conversational skills and general overall being I’ve got to say I’m really going to miss this fishy faced bitch!
We are one step closer to crowning America’s next drag superstar!
You can catch Banaka every Monday night at Number 9 in DC as she hosts Washington’s premier RuPaul’s Drag Race viewing party. And for more on DC’s queer nightlife scene, follow the BYGays on Twitter.