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This week was pretty much taken over by television. Between watching a ridiculous amount of The Bachelor and the epic viewing experience that is the Academy Awards, I’ve given ABC probably about an entire day of my life. When I wasn’t watching TV, I was either reading articles about what I watched or listening to podcasts about what I saw. I’d like to say after this week I’ll give up screens for lent… but I’m Jewish, so I don’t have to. But here’s what I was reading, watching, listening, engaging with this week. Now that I don’t have another Bachelor franchise show until the end of May and awards season is over, if there are any great reads I missed, fill me in! I’ve gotten time and my eyeballs back.

On the BYT Website: 

–The longest, most boring season of The Bachelor finally ended on Tuesday with a two-day finale that stretched on for five hours (that’s longer than the Oscars) and with it killed our dreams of Chris Harrison adopting us. Also, if you have as many feelings as we do about this show, you really should do yourself a favor, put down that application to be on the show, and purchase the new book Bachelor Nation by Amy Kaufman. 

–We looked at great places for a first date and, if you’re on the same timeline as the crazies on The Bachelor and want to pop the question after less than a month of total time together, we have a list of the best places to put a ring on it.

–I got to know Milly Tamarez who taught me a thing or ten about being a hilarious while also taking producing content seriously.

–I went to The Anthem for the first time to see Little Big Town and was a bit bummed to see a jumbotron, but no kiss cam.

All the Other Things on the Web Consuming My Brain: 

–We celebrated International Women’s Day by ignoring Mike Pence’s dinner invitation and instead reading long overdue obituaries. As a total cliche that developed a Sylvia Plath infatuation in college (I know my face is in fact posted in the dictionary under Basic), I kind of can’t believe she hasn’t gotten a New York Times obit until now.

–And Woolly Mammoth Theatre celebrated the day in the best way possible. Let’s start filling our theaters with more women in top brass positions in front of and behind stage.

–Netflix giveith and taketh away from the afterglow of February’s Black History Month. I kind of would love to see what Obama and Ryan Murphy might do together now that they’re both hanging around the Netflix offices.

–Someone does us all a solid and goes to see if Vanderpump Rules’ DJ James Kennedy can actually do anything besides drink…I mean if he can DJ. Not only do I love Kara Brown’s writing and her fantastic quips on the podcast Keep It, I also can’t seem to get enough VPR content. I not only watch the show, belong to a Facebook group where I talk about the show, but I also have two podcasts (Watch What Crappens and Sexy Unique Podcast). Somebody help me.

–Someone tried to steal Frances McDormand’s Oscar at the after party but it’s all good because she snagged a bucket of bougie fried chicken and the rightful admiration of everyone at the Vanity Fair party. I’m perhaps more obsessed with after party and behind the scenes coverage than I am with the actual show.

–Speaking of delicious fried chicken, QUARRY HOUSE IS REOPENING THIS WEEKEND!! Screw your diet and go get their amazing PBR-battered chicken fingers. This spot, pre-marriage, was one of my go-to first date spots. The mood in the basement was grungy, dark sexy and the whiskey list was so extensive it guaranteed we could get liquored up real good and real quick. Now that I’m hitched and have a kid, I fantasize about chicken fingers and tatter tots I don’t have to share.