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We had a little email chit-chat with Luke Rathborne in advance of the Rathborne gig at Bowery Electric tonight. First, you’re definitely going to want to grab tickets to the show, but second, you’re ALSO definitely going to want to internet-eavesdrop on our conversation below, because we covered everything from acrostics to the Rathborne Color of the Year to dollar dumplings vs. dollar pizza to #HASHTAGSOFWISDOM. You should also probably do yourself a favor and snag a copy of Soft RIGHT NOW, because if you’re anything like we are, you will be placing its eleven track contents on HEAVY rotation from now until forever. So without further adieu, HERE WE GO:

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My life’s dream is to create a website where instead of listicles there are only acrostics. (It will be titled www.AreCrocsReallyOldShoesThatIrkCarlySimon.com) Please create an acrostic for RATHBORNE if you can!

Ιησούς Χριστός, Θεού Υιός, Σωτήρ; Iesous CHristos, THeou Yios, Soter

You were shooting a video today. What can you tell me about that? Did they have good snacks on set? (I hope they had Flamin’ Hot Cheetos…I tried them for the first time three weeks ago and they are pretty good, but you can only eat twelve at a time or something or else you become Flamin’ Hot in a bad way.)

All I can think of all the time is wearing make up. How can I change myself. What is the newest look this season? How do I get a dewey effervescent smokey eye that still has the ‘slept in 90’s look’ of a post-Soul Cycle Courtney Love circa 2005. If I died would these words be held against me? What is the #hottestsummerlook and how do I get it. How did I get into this Forever 21 and why does it keep lying to me. I want a keychain that talks to me, really talks to me and tells me how it feels. Pikachu.

Do you think you will cover “Too Many Cooks” at your show tomorrow? Why or why not?

I like “Too Many Cooks”, but I prefer wonder Showzen by John Lee and Vernon Chatman. They are the originators of this kind of comedy and everything else lands second best. #shoutout #pffr

The year is coming to a close. What was the highlight (musically or otherwise) for you in 2014?

I had a dream where a lot of the music that’s popular just dissappeared and all we were left with was our actual feelings. No one could turn on their radios and we were all just changing our hair styles but could never decide and just leave our houses and apartments. Eventually all the power lines stopped making power and the water wouldn’t run, but we all learned how to love.

Pantone said that the color of the year for 2015 is “marsala”. 1. without googling, please explain what this color looks like, and 2. what is the color of the year for Rathborne?

The color of the year for Rathborne is DEFINITELY magenta. It’s ALWAYS magenta. Marsala would be lucky to even go on a date with Magenta and would barely even get to second base (in their mind!) burn!

qblSoft – Having your wisdom teeth removed blows. Assuming YOU have had this procedure done, what is THE BEST soft food to eat afterwards? 

I think a milkshake would be a great soft food that would be safe after having your wisdoms taken out. Someone once tried to convince me milkshakes were especially good when on Vicodin. Don’t hear from that guy anymore.. Wonder why..

What More – What less?

We could have less of so many things. War, plain Cheerios. I guess when you’re talking about this song, the song was about watching a band really suffer on stage, I was on a tour and a friend texted me ‘what more could the devil want from them?’. I thought it was a funny thing to say. Like, ‘havent these Gus suffered enough?’ (Looking up towards the godly presence)

I’m So Tired – What is the longest you have ever gone without sleep?

I think when I was a teenager I remember going two days without sleep. That was pretty interesting. I tend to like sleep more now. I’m old..

Eno – Brian Eno wrote Ambient 1: Music For Airports so people could feel great about getting ready to maybe die in a plane crash. If you could tack on a bonus track to this, what would it be? (Your material or otherwise, doesn’t matter.)

For some reason I’m thinking of dentists now. What if we could just blast ‘Metal Machine Music’ into the ears of people getting their teeth drilled into. Shouldn’t going to the dentist be partly about losing your mind? Why is it that we have to pretend we’re not scared, in the presence of these men? Surely, they get off on the kind of sadistic terror that their instruments and ‘official’ offices/uniforms create.

Low! – Low and slow is arguably the best way to make some mean BBQ. What is the best BBQ you have ever eaten? (Assuming you are of the BBQ persuasion.)

Meat is murder.

Little Moment – Best little moment you’ve had over the last forty-eight hours?

I can tell you that I saw a middle aged woman smiling at everything on the subway. She seemed like she was just enjoying absolutely everything. I felt like Rasputin and very offended by her undiscerning happiness. I guess we all get to a point in our lives as New Yorkers where we’re actually threatened by outward expressions of happiness. That’s sad. 🙁

This song is actually about being a good person, not what I just said.

Last Forgiven – Are you generally a forgiver or are you (like me) into holding grudges #FOREVER?

#FOREVER – you hear that sophomore English teacher!? Why did you never give me above a 75% on anything! You had it in for me! I’ve thought about emailing you before! I’m using this space to out you. You should be helping grow the minds of young individuals, instead you poison them with your petty resentments.

Wanna Be You – If you could trade places with anyone in the world for twenty-four hours, who would it be?

I’ve noticed that golden retrievers are constantly enjoying themselves. I tend to think of them as people as well. I don’t know. What if I don’t know the answer to your question? What’re you gonna do about it. That’s what I thought.

Deal – I think most musicians have had at least one bad show. When that bad show happens, HOW DO YOU DEAL?!

Oh yeah. I’ve only had one bad show. Sure. Sureeeee….

Tbh (that is an acronym)… I’ve never physically detached from myself to see myself play a bad show. If I did, I’d probably be having one of those – light at the end of a tunnel death moments, in which case everyone would probably be thrilled watching whatever show was happening. I once watched the singer of Deerhunter Bradford Cox getting a blowjob at the end of a show on stage from the guitar player. That was pretty intense! But beyond that, the question before where I could come back as a golden retriever.. Maybe I would watch my show as a golden retriever. But it might be too loud. Dogs have very sensitive ears. God designed them that way. What more could God want from them?

Why – Why New York as opposed to another home base?

Good question. Why are you here? Don’t you just end up getting so broke in NYC that you can’t afford a plane ticket out? Why did jon voight stay in NYC in ‘Midnite Cowboy’? Is it because he loved Dustin Hoffman? Is that a spoiler alert? What if God was one of us? I guess I have more questions than answers today.

So Long NYC – If someone deleted New York, what would the next best city be to take its place?

If somebody deleted New York!? Who deleted it? I would be more concerned that some Machiavellian evil individual was deleting cities and I would feel unsafe, everywhere, all the time. I wouldn’t be able to enjoy myself in a major city. Seems like Id have to go off the grid, live off the land, no? Can you guarantee me it won’t happen again?

nycq

Dollar Pizza or Dollar Dumplings?

Dollar dumplings. Easy.

Best Subway Line // WORST Subway Line?

Whoa. Seriously? That’s crazy. I heard if you keep riding the 1, 2, 3 past the Staten Island ferry you see where the ninja turtles lived.

Coney Island or Rockaway Beach?

They’re both really cool. Coney Island is great though. I walked to woody guthries house there once. It took me forever. It’s just an old persons home now. Strange.

East Village or West Village?

I dunno man. Who cares. I could puke on both. They should combine them together and call them ‘CHASE BANK PRESENTS: VILLAGE’

Empire State Building or Statue of Liberty?

I want to go to the WaMu Washington Mutual Bank of America Empire Statue of Liberty. As long as they don’t charge 0% APR on my first overdraft fee, and I can get there by a boat! 75 dollars to use the bathroom on the top floor!

final

Finally, do you have any #HASHTAGSOFWISDOM to impart before we wrap this up?

#KEEP #IT #COOL

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