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This past weekend I house sat for a friend (read: she took pity on my lack of air conditioning and cable television and offered me the opportunity to water her plants for three days), and I actually strained my eyes to the point of physical pain due to how much mindless screen staring I did. As I was flipping channels, I was reminded of how hard MTV sucks at present; while I love Barbara from Teen Mom’s insane accent as much as the next guy, it’s not enough to keep me interested in shows that pale in comparison to the golden years of yore, when Daria, Beavis and Butthead, and even Laguna Beach ruled the airwaves.

And so you can imagine how goddamn delighted I was to find out that MTV will soon be transforming VH1 Classic into MTV Classic, a channel that will be devoted to the worship of the glory days of the 1990s and early 2000s! Programming will include primetime blocks (Monday thru Thursday 10pm-1am) of TRL, Daria, Beavis and Butthead, Aeon Flux, Cribs, Jackass, Pimp My Ride, Clone High, Wonder Showzen, Punk’d and more, plus weekends will feature marathons of shows like Laguna Beach, Real World, Road Rules, etc. AND I CANNOT FUCKING WAIT!

All of this launches on August 1st (SO SOON!) and will kick off at 6am with MTV’s original first hour of broadcasting, which happened thirty-five years prior on August 1st, 1981. In addition to the aforementioned TV shows, they’ll run concerts, music videos and movies from the last three decades. I thought I could be a person without television like my cool, culturally endowed fellow Brooklynites, but I think I may just have to drink the Time Warner Cable Kool-Aid this summer and get a package. (Because let’s face it, no matter how vapid, nostalgia is PRICELESS.)