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Everyone went to SXSW and left me all alone.  Oh what ever shall I do???

Forward Festival is in full swing, check out our extensive guide here.

THUR

Bluebrain.  Duh.

If it sells out check out Brazilian Rythms with DJ Neville C @ St. EX or Portugal. The Man @ 9:30 Club

FRI

This event wins for the flyer alone: Ron Trent (CHI) & Chris Burns present “BODY MUSIC” @ 411 Penn Warehouse

and for the the man violators: BALLS! Dance Party @ Velvet Lounge

and for some rock and roll: the Black Lips are @ the Black Cat

and of course the Ricky Gervais Show on HBO

SAT

Fly to Austin and check out our killer DCXSXSW showcase

If all the flights are booked check out Spinal Tap, I mean Anvil @ 9:30 Club

Also Conner and Industry have gallery openings

And celebrate Lady Gaga’s bday @ Town at a party entitled Gagarama, which you can pronounce based on your personal feelings toward this event.

SUN

David London’s SUNDAY CIRCUS @ The Fridge looks rad

And the real circus is in town too!

And some crazy people music: Magik Markers / Buildings @ Black Cat

Did you know Matthew wrote that Jesus was born of a virgin because he was trying to fulfill a prophecy in Isaiah 7:14, but he was working from mistranslated text where “young woman” was accidentally changed to “virgin”. Whoopsie-daisy!  Mary is a dirty slut after all!  And check out this old hymn:

The centuries marvel that the angel bore the semen, the virgin conceived through her ear, and, believing in her heart, became fruitful

and all this time I thought ear sex involved 1-900 numbers.  ZING!

What did I miss?  Leave some comments.

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