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In an effort to catalog the mass sexual dysfunction in the District of Columbia, we bring you BYT’s Below The Beltway series. 1 week. 1 person. 1 city. Total Anonymity guaranteed.


20-year-old female student/customer service rep and 20-year-old male student/pizza man, in a relationship for three years.


Day 1

5:00 pm Just got off work and I’m totally wiped. Anxious for going to
the boy’s house (we’ll call him C) for some sort of surprise that
entails a bubble bath- or so I’m told. I spend about an hour at
Starbucks fantasizing about a venti serving of coffee house sex… hot,
with extra whip. I’m not allowed over till seven, so I have to get
creative with passing the time.

The downside to being young and in college… besides the college part,
is the fact that we’re both still living at home. His parents are off
on vacation this weekend, so we have his house to ourselves. (It feels
like high school all over again.) But hey, we take what we get. The
weekend is ours, and our only companions are C’s older sister and her
fiancee, who live in the basement and are respectfully oblivious.

6:50pm I get there early, not really knowing what to expect. It’s not
an anniversary, holiday, or an apology for fucking up. It’s a “just
because” surprise, which is always nice. C leads me up the stairs to
his bedroom. It’s completely dark, except for two candles on either
side of the room. There’s a dozen red roses beside the bed. After
noticing this, I’m excited to see that his room is unusually clean. That puts
me in the mood even more. (Having said this, I just realized how
domesticated I feel right now. I need to get some guy to go make ME a
sandwich to break even from that remark.)

It was romantic in that cliche, movie-esque way. The whole thing was a
complete indulgence, and I can’t say I mind. He starts kissing me and
the clothes came off in record time. He lays me on the bed and pulled
a blanket over us. Him on top and sometime later, we both collapse on
the bed, sweaty, happy, and very content. At this point, I’m still
ready to go. But he goes to to turn the water on for the bath. When
he returns, I pounce. I love how what he can do with his tongue. A
half an hour of moaning later, the bathtub is full and awaiting some
company. We lounge in the tub for a while and contemplate the
trade-off between tub sex and having to clean up a soaked bathroom
afterwards. We go back to the bed instead. My wet hair leaves a huge
water mark on the bed. It’s amusing to discover afterwards.

10:00pm He’s hungry, I’m ready to go again. But apparently I’m wicked
tired too. He goes downstairs to get post-nookie munchies. When he
returns, I’m still naked, passed out on the bed.

Day Two

1:00am I wake up, horny as hell and being naked doesn’t help. C wakes
up easily. And what guy wouldn’t when you wake them up to ask them to
fuck you again? It’s good, but I’m still half asleep as well. He
finishes, I get close. We call it fair enough when he finishes me off
with by just playing with my clit. We fall asleep cuddling.

8:30am I drag myself out of bed and try to cautiously maneuver around
C, trying not to wake him up. I decide to trash the idea, and he wakes
up to me putting a condom on him. We do the morning sex thing,
face-to-face, and I don’t seem to notice any morning breath. That’s a
plus. I end up on the bathroom counter against the mirror with him
standing in front of me. It’s a great morning. The are huge hickeys
all over my tits from last night. C stands next to me afterwards and
admires his work.

9:30am Pizza for breakfast and a Bailey’s spiked Earl Grey latte. C
tells me we have to take a trip to Emissions for his mom. we make
plans to go see Kickass with our friend later in the day. We have a
party to go to that night, so it’ll be a busy day.

11:00am We’re about to head out to Emissions but I drag him to bed just
once more. It’s a quickie, but satisfying nonetheless. We’re done and
off to Emissions.

1:00pm Home again and wanting more sex. I’m shamelessly horny
sometimes. C doesn’t seem to mind. We’re back in bed for a while. He
loves to be on top. It always amuses me. Doing anything else, I’m
usually the one in control. (I can make handcuffs out of a thong.
‘Nuff said) But when it comes to having sex, I’m perfectly fine being
dominated. He gets a lot deeper when he’s on top anyways.

2:00pm Off to Target. Pressed for time so that we can fit in another
quickie before our friends get to the house before the movie. Going to
Target always reminds me of fooling around in their dressing rooms.
It’s adventurous to do it a few times. Make it a habit, and that
shit’s trashy.

3:15pm Home and up the stairs into bed. A really good quickie with C
on my G-spot the whole time. Get up with sex-hair and answer the door
for our friends just in time. They look at me knowingly and amused.

5:30pm The movie’s too good to sneak out and fool around somewhere.

7:00pm Back at the house with less than an hour to be at the party. I
get ready and C does me again. Sex in heels is great, especially when
your ankles are crossed behind their neck.

8:00pm My friend chose to have a swing dancing party for her 20th
birthday. She also chose to tell me that my most recent ex, R, was not
coming nor bringing his super-slutty new girlfriend. They were both
there. Fun, right? He spends the night eyeing me, while the tramp
paws all over him. It’s comical, and a bit tragic. We swing dance
the night away.

11:00pm Home, calves aching. In general, our whole bodies are aching
due to the copious amounts of sex had lately. We pass out almost
instantly. 8 times in 24 hours? Where’s my fucking trophy?

Day 3

10:00am It’s Sunday, and we’re content on sleeping in. But eventually
we stumble out of bed, sore as fuck and barely able to move. Between
the dancing and the fucking, we’re both shot. The rest of the morning
is filled with munchies and movies and snuggling.

2:30pm C has work today from 3-11:30pm. I pack my stuff, grab my
roses and head back home.

10:30pm Finally get to sleep. It’s weird to be alone in bed after the
weekend. Especially when I’m left to my own devices after such an epic

Day 4

8:30am On my way to work when “Feel Like Makin’ Love” comes on… I
agree with Bad Company on that one.

5:30pm Off work and on the way home. C works from 5-9pm tonight, so
nothing for me.

10:30pm Regrettably left to my own devices again tonight. It’s never
as good.

Day 5

2:00pm Going out tonight with C. It’s a slow day at work, so I run off
to the bathroom and send him a shirtless picture. I feel productive.

4:30pm On the way to Ram’s Head Live in Baltimore for the Mastodon
concert- one of C’s birthday presents to me. Extremely excited, and
even more horny. I make sure he brings some condoms along.

8:00pm The concert is awesome. We’re tempted to run off to the
bathroom, but we have awesome spots- balcony with a full view of the
stage. But somehow, R ends up directly under us in front of the stage.
What are the odds of that?

10:30pm I run into R on the way out. He is sans girlfriend and gives
an appreciative look to my chest. Oh ex-boyfriends…

11:30pm We get back to my office to pick my car up. C’s too tired to
go upstairs and finish the night off with a bang. I grudgingly let him

12:30am Home and pulling an all-nighter to catch up on class work.

3:30am I crawl into bed- still horny, still disappointed. Oh well.

Day 6

5:30pm Heading to class. I don’t get out till late. Probably stopping
at C’s house to get some afterwards. A girl has needs.

7:30pm Sitting in class fantasizing about later tonight. Decide to put
together a sexy schoolgirl outfit sometime soon and take it over there.
Roleplaying is so much fun.

9:00pm Text C to let him know that I want sex and a Mountain Dew
Slurpee. Probably one of the most epic sentences ever.

9:45pm Finally at C’s house. I’m halfway up the stairs a minute after
I get in the door, Slurpee in hand, pulling off my clothes as I go.
I’m already naked and in bed by the time he gets up stairs after me.
He grabs me and pushes inside of me. We end up in my favorite position-
C on his knees but still upright, thrusting inside me, with one of my
legs over each shoulder. Sometimes I forget how good he looks when
we’re having sex. I get lost in checking him out for a couple minutes,
then get interrupted by my desire for more Slurpee. I interrupt his
thrusts and lean over to grab it off the night table. Sex and Slurpees
are a match made in heaven.

10:30pm I leave, content but still horny. Only upon leaving did I
realize the house was empty and I could’ve made as much noise as I
wanted. That’s disappointing.

Day 7

5:00pm No classes tonight so I’m off to my house to cook dinner. C’s
coming over later.

6:30pm We’re sitting on the couch eating and watching Hannibal Rising.

I’m ridiculously horny. I start pawing at him on the couch, just to
get him horny too, out of spite. We can’t do anything at my house.
There’s too many people around.

7:00pm We leave with the excuse of going to play video games at his
house. I fully intend to do so…and then fuck him some more.

7:30pm We get to C’s house and go downstairs to play Dante’s Inferno.
I love that he has an xBox, it makes life so much easier. After
descending into hell and killing various demons, we save and go

8:30pm Ever heard the phrase “fuck me sideways?” Well, it’s fun. The
penetration’s deeper, the G-spot contact’s ten million times better than
anything else.It’s incredible. We both finish close to the same time, just
missing that amazing, yet elusive, concurrent orgasm. But it was great
either way.

9:15pm I have to ahead home to catch up on much needed studying. I
wish we could fit in one more time before I leave. Still horny, C drives me
home. I’m still kind of tempted to have him take a detour and go have some
car sex. Speaking of which, we haven’t done anything in his car for a while.
C continues to drive me home without incident. He drops me off, kisses me,
and away he goes… my stallion- I do so love the peak years of the male sex drive.