Behind the Desk 73: I Dreamed A Dream
Brandon Wetherbee | Dec 7, 2012 | 3:11PM |

Brandon Wetherbee hosts the talk show/podcast You, Me, Them, Everybody at the Wonderland Ballroom in D.C. and in Baltimore, Brooklyn, Chicago and Philadelphia. Listen to it online at He’ll be hosting You, Me, Them, Everybody this Friday at the Wonderland Ballroom with house band FUN?, interesting person Legba Carrefour, stand up Becca Steinhoff, stand up comedy person Adam Friedland and advice expert Sara Armour.

We just celebrated our third year of live shows. We did it live in four cities in eight days. We locked the gates. We made it weird. We Comedy Bang-Banged all over the place.

The shows were O.K. They started off really well and slowly crawled down to decent. This has nothing to do with the guests or venues. The guests and venues were and are great. I was the one that kind of faded into ugh.

I’m relatively young. I’m full of piss and vinegar and other Olive Garden salad dressing toppings. I need more experience.

My good friend Ned Hepburn was the final guest on the final show. He’s a cool dude. He posts cool things on Facebook (Bookmark it! The day after doing my show he posted this video.

I talk to Ned about wanting to have a show like Craig Ferguson. This monologue is one of the reasons why. I have and am losing youth. This is good. I am losing my youth and gaining experience. This is good.

Youth is good. Youth can produce amazing products. A band like The Misfits were amazing in the first few years of their existence. Their energy and stupidity created songs that sounds vibrant thirty years later.

Then the band fought a lot and gained experience and weight and coke and became a parody of themselves.

So youth isn’t bad, there’s just a sweet spot. Think of M. Night Shyamalan. The guy made one of the best thrillers at the age of 30. Since then he’s become a parody of a good director. “From the mind of M. Night Shyamalan” is now a very funny joke. Ha. Joke.

Speaking of jokes, I will see the new version of “Les Miserables” because the person I love wants to see it and that’s what people do. She’s been playing the trailer and “I Dreamed A Dream” to remind me that I do not care about “Les Miserables.”

But that song did remind of a Susan Boyle. I am now a Susan Boyle fan. Last night I watched this video and cried and I am a man.

Every part of this television show segment is perfect. A woman ‘past her prime’ to release popular music goes on stage with confidence, answers questions from smug hosts and sings a song about how all hope is lost and death and mom’s spaghetti and one shot and FTW YOLO. Boyle’s performance is perfect because it’s the culmination of years and years and years of singing practice to ‘no one’s’ that led her to be able to appear on one of the world’s most popular shows, sing one of the 20th centuries most popular songs and own that shit.

I need more experience. I’m getting more experience. I’ll never be as youthful as The Misfits or mysterious as M. Night Shyamalan, but I have the potential to be as relevant as Craig Ferguson and kick ass as Susan Boyle. Or I’ll tell dick jokes and a few people with smile and that’s cool too.

Thanks for reading and have a wonderful night.