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Welcome to A Pumpkin A Day, our new series highlighting the finest in fake pumpkin flavors! Beginning mid-September and running through whenever grocery stores and cafes stop selling pumpkin flavored seasonal treats, we’ll highlight one pointlessly pumpkin product per day.

Giant joined Trader Joe’s. It’s officially autumn in grocery stores.

Our first Giant offering is a milk chocolate bar no one asked for. How do we know that? Have you ever craved a pumpkin spice milk chocolate bar?




None. Why? No one wanted this. How can you have expectations for something no one craved?

Maybe autumn. Can a time period be an expectation?  All of these packages tell you what season they’re going for rather than just trying to deliver flavors reminiscent of a season.



Taste Test

Cheap. This is a cheap tasting candy bar that does not need to exist.



Cheap. The packaging is better than the product. The look of the packaging. The feel is just as cheap as the chocolate.

This is the type of product that gives seasonal pumpkin treats a bad name. Yesterday’s Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Spice Caramel Corn was perfect compared to this disaster. The Giant candy bar has better packaging than the popcorn but the inside is what matters and the Giant insides are a giant disaster.