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The future is bright, or at least covered in bio-luminescent algae:

Lisa Markuson’s Haiku Predictions for 2015

Haiku is a verb and a noun and today, on the eve of a new year, a tool to make positive forecasts that will certainly be self-fulfilling if we all believe in fairies and do something nice for a stranger. Just try it. I dare you.

futile to resist
if the stars are aligning
buy me some popcorn

(star wars will be the biggest blockbuster film of 2015 and the only sequel i watch)

prisoners of war
start small biz incubators
here in kazakhstan

(gitmo will close and relocated prisoners will become productive members of their new societies)

teen suicide will
drastically plummet when
art returns to schools

(tragedies like the death of leelah alcorn will become a thing of the past when government budgets will fund creative development and support for all youth)

no planes will crash but
if they do fall from the sky
they’ll turn into boats

(mystery plane disappearance will stop, because they’re just too sad and creepy)

all of those racists
in elected positions
will stop that nonsense

(equality and acceptance will become the two leading political parties, and they’ll hold open doors for each other in the capitol building)

yoga will become
something that families can share
not diabetes

(health care revolutions will help families get healthy together and reverse global health epidemics)

the thing you had feared
will turn out to be better
than you could have dreamed

(nay-sayers, pessimists, doomsday predictors, climate scientists, and conspiracy theorists will be shocked to find that they were wrong. and you’ll find love in an unexpected place)

What are your predictions for 2015? Tweet them @lisamarkuson / @thehaikuguys or send us an email at [email protected].

In NYC for New Year’s Eve and want an original haiku of your very own? We’ll be at free parties in Brooklyn from 7:30-9 (Milk and Roses) and 9:30-11 (The Royal Palms) so come by and hit us with your best topic.