• Turn on your sound with this video, please:

• Take a peek inside celebrity closets. Here’s Ralph Lauren’s:

• Hear Morgan Freeman Read Fifty Shades of Grey (Spoiler alert: It’s actually comedian Josh Robert Thompson)

• Listen to a playlist from The Wire’s Michael K. Williams, aka Omar Little.
• Real life Bert and Ernie are sorta fuckin’ freaking me out (and that’s saying a lot). Please stop it guys.

• McDonald’s Goes Vegetarian in India. Understandable when half the customers can’t eat pork and the other half can’t eat beef.
• Does stripping imitate art or does art imitate stripping? New York strip club wants lap dances classified as tax-exempt art.
• I was going to get mad at this guy for dressing up like a video game character (Assassin’s Creed), but then again a good parkour video is like pizza or sex: it’s always good, and there’s always cheese involved:

• 19 Perfect Moments In Subtitles History. [interested clicking]

• A children’s film named The Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure opened in wide release over the Labor Day weekend and became the biggest bomb in U.S. movie history. Strangely, that record may help it find an audience.
• Lady, you’re awesome: Woman arrested four times in one day for playing “Highway to Hell” as loud as possible.
• I drink because liquor is beautiful: Alcoholic Art: Liquor Under a Microscope

How to make your own luxury island. All you need is several billion dollars and unlimited sand

• Check out a solar flare (that stretched out a half million miles) and our perspective from earth

• And finally, treat yo’self to the Parks & Rec Season 4 gag reel

• Until tomorrow, leave me alone I’m going to go play in the bathroom garbage can