Good morning, good morning and welcome to December.

• How to make your own beer advent calendar.
• If you do one thing online today, please let it be visiting Gizoogle, typing in anything a la Google search, and being amazed and mystified as your search results–descriptions, menus, articles on giant squid, what have you–become translated into slang. Yes, yes, yes.
• Farewell, Movember. Here’s a genius tutorial on how to kill a mustache:
  
• The Little Rascals then and now.
  
  
• Man leaves most amazing poem-comment of all time in Amazon user review of a book of poetry about the Oregon Trail.
  “…Who owns the rivers? I want to complain about their frequency and color. There are too many. They are too green. We must fjord them every page – even when the pages are between pages. Who designed the rivers? They work against us. They should make us lightweight. Why are your full of rivers of sex? Why doesn’t the sex make us lightweight? Why doesn’t the sex flow from shore to shore instead of north to south? Why am I not full of sex? Even the oxen are full of sex. Even the bullets are full of sex. Oregon Trail, you remind me everything in the world is full of sex, even if everything is in 2D…”
• Skrillex now has his own online videogame, Skrillex Quest, wherein you save a dubstep princess. True story.
  
• In your Religion News of the Day, the Pope is joining Twitter on Dec. 12 with a handle of @Pontifex.
• And in your Trippy As F*ck of the Day, here are five hours of airplane landings condensed into under 30 seconds. Planes on planes on planes:
  
• Once upon a time, the U.S. planned to fire nuclear missiles at the moon.
• Speaking of space, YOU GUYS HERE’S THE BRAND NEW STAR TREK POSTER:
  
• Let’s keep this nerd theme a-goin’ with a brief history of video games:
  
• Me: “We all need to be sitting on the rug right now, Mimi.”
  Mimi, age 3: “No thanks. I’m doing Gangam Style right now.”
  Shit Preschoolers Say. 
• Jared Leto looks terrifying after shaving eyebrows, starving himself to play HIV-positive transsexual woman.
  
• Even scarier: your face on meth. Before and Afters of prolonged meth users.
  
• Sorry, guys. Let’s cleanse the creepy with these tree houses for grownups.
• New study suggests journaling about your heartbreak just makes it worse. …So I guess I’ll just close the tab on this LiveJournal ode to Ben Gibbard now…
• And in what might be the greatest mashup of all time, here’s Nic Cage inserted into classic movies. Brilliant:
  

‘Til next time, keep up the healthy relationships.