Do you like Pork?  Do you hate Moby? We do. Check this out: COCHON 555 WASHINGTON DC: Five Chefs, Five Pigs, Five Winemakers.  You finally get your chance to tell Moby what you think of his stupid new book.  Talk with your stomachs, kids.

How many pigs, you ask? FIVE pigs.  Count them.  One, Two, Three, Four, Five PIGS.  Each at a hundred and forty pounds.  And this event is at the Ritz Carlton, so it aint no joke.

You can get tickets online (details below) but we’ve got a pair of General Admission tickets for one lucky reader who comes up with a bitchin’ Haiku about pork or pig or hog or boar.  We asked Bentzen Ball comedian Justin Cousson to get the Haiku-party started.  Here’s his haiku:

“Forbidden to some

non-Kosher and non-Rasta

but those who dare, win.”

So yeah, post a pork-related haiku in the comments section and you might find yourself in Hog Heaven this Sunday night!  Bonus points for Moby-hatred haikus.

Details:

A group of chefs will each prepare a 140 pound heritage breed hog from head to toe in this friendly competition for a cause. Guests and professional judges will determine a winner based on presentation, utilization and overall best flavor. The winner will be crowned the “Prince of Porc”. In addition, five selected winemakers will showcase their wines. COCHON 555 is a tribute to heritage and heirloom breeds, chefs and winemakers.

Each 140 lb pig can be pre-cooked, braised, grilled, pressed, pickled, rubbed, smoked, seared, sauced, spiced, injected, marinated, cured in any way, or otherwise prepared. Guest of the event will experience the chef creations during the stand-up reception. Chef stations will alternate with winemaker tables. Guests should not arrive late for this event. The event concludes with a whole roasted pig, dessert and award presentation.

FIVE CHEFS:
R.J. COOPER – Vidalia Restaurant
NICHOLAS STEFANELLI – Bibiana
DAVID VARLEY – Bourbon Steak
DAN SINGHOFEN – Eola
JOE PALMA – Westend Bistro

Special Guest Chef:
Victor Albisu – BLT Steak

VIP EXPERIENCE: Start early with an Surf & Turf station with Oysters from Choptank Oyster Company & Whole Foods and then dig into Gryffon’s Aerie Devon Steak Tartare prepared by Chef Varley. Sample cured meats from The Belmont Butchery and enjoy the reserve wine tasting from Silver Oak Cellars, Blenheim Vineyards, Anderson’s Conn Valley and Donkey and Goat Winery. Cowgirl Creamery will present an artisan cheese installation along side savory cocktails by Daniel Hyatt Alembic SF and craft brews from Heavy Seas Beer. Best of all, guests can meat and greet with the chefs, winemakers and judges of COCHON555. (VIP begins at 3:30pm).

GENERAL ADMISSION: Guests will witness a whole pig butcher demonstration by Ryan Farr with commentary from Bev Eggleston while consuming over 750lbs of swine, great wines and craft brews. The competition is followed by a whole roasted pig from Victor Albisu of BLT Steak and a pig perfect dessert. This is a full day of new and old relationships, great chefs, swine, wine and we look forward to sharing it with you. (General Admission begins at 5pm)
WHY: To promote heritage pigs and breed diversity in local and national communities.

LOCATION: Ritz-Carlton Washington DC, 1150 22nd Street, N.W., Washington, D.C. 20037

Details are listed on FaceBook. Invite your friends.
http://tinyurl.com/wash555

DISCOUNT CODES:
$25 OFF: farmfresh
BUY TICKETS: http://www.cochon555.com

Haiku away.  Leave your name!  Bentzen Ball favorite and BYT contributor Seaton Smith will be judging the contest.  He’ll be at the event, too, so you’ll get to hang with him while he stuffs his face with meat.