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No Pants Metro Ride
January 13, 2009 | 12:15PM

all words by Dakota, photos by Dakota and Noah Devereaux

Here’s the thing. In theory a No Pants Metro Ride sounds hilarious, right? Like, “hahaha, a bunch of people in their underwear, totally out of place, surprising all the regular metro riders!” And, I guess for the most part, the event was pretty hilarious, but probably not for the reasons you might expect.

The event was organized by a group called DC Defenestrators, which I think, can be most aptly described as an improv group. Think liberal arts college/high school drama club, you know, the guys who have theme parties that inevitably wind up into a show tunes singing competition after everyone’s had a bit too much Goldschl√§ger? Yeah, now we’re talking.

At first the whole experiment sounds tittilating, I’m guessing there must have been a lot of creepster dudes (see dude in banana hammock who insisted that he be next to a girl when I asked him to pose with my friend James) who showed up expecting to see some hotties in their panties, to no avail. And that had to have been one of the most disappointing factors about the whole event. The lead organizer, Bruce Witzenburg, not only announced that he had “double-bagged” himself, he encouraged others to do so as well! I can’t tell you how many dudes I saw in gross, baggy, boxers. (See XBOX 360 boxers.)

Let’s not beat around the bush here people. The reason this thing is even remotely exciting is due to the semi-sexual nature of the affair… if you’re not going balls out, and by balls out I mean, some TIGHT shorts, what the hell is the point? I’m just sayin. You all can judge for yourselves.

check out the vid:

BYT: No Pants Metro Ride (DC) from Dakota Fine on Vimeo.

DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-13 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-3 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-4 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-6 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-7 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-8 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-19 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-16 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-15 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-10 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-20 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-14 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-25 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-22 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-23 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-21 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-27 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-29 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-33 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-32 DF09_1.10_PantlessMetroDC-30 _MG_0270 _MG_0299_1 _MG_0184 _MG_0253 _MG_0161 _MG_0102 _MG_0137

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Recent Comments:
  • Dette says:

    Sir, talumpati po about sa high shcool ka, tapos pagbalik mo sa alma matter mo ay isa ka ng ganap na doktor, halimbawa, at inanyayahan ka nilang maging guest speaker,. salamat po. pa send po sa email ko. thanks.

  • Kalynn says:

    Like the above…DC Defenestrators may have organized the event but it was originally started by Improv Everywhere. Kudos for bringing it to DC but the Defenestrators are not the prankster masterminds behind the No Pants Metro Ride.

  • Haas says:

    The only reason it happened in DC is because the NY group encourages people across the country to participate. I’m not a part of the Defenestrators and I think most of the people who participated found out through the grapevine that is Facebook. I’m not sure I’ll do it again but it was excactly what I excpected. A very loosley organzied group of people riding around the metro. What did you expect?

  • yonas says:

    Ummm….the blonde @ +00:17 in the video? Me likey. The boots are an extra special touch.

  • Amanda says:

    i’m digging the man panties.

  • MARNA Swims says:

    Excellent event…the Naturist and clothes free community was proud to support!

  • MARNA says:

    see us on Facebook — naturally young maryland

  • Stephen K says:

    I double-bagged at first. I bought what they called “boxer briefs.” But then on the platform, one very cute, tiny young woman in very cute, tiny panties persuaded me to drop ‘em. So I took the ride in my tighty-whities. That’s me holding the overhead rail with both hands. There’s also a close-up of the other side.

    • Lilia says:

      Very interesting I was tihkning the same thing that James was tihkning bearing in mind that the picture was taken the morning of Jan 1st. MMMM Must have been a great party!

  • Josh B says:

    First off, you guys need to do some research.

    It’s an annual thing put on by a group called Improv Everywhere, who are located in New York. They have been doing this for 8 years now. this year, they had 1200-1500 people show up.

  • Dakota says:

    @Josh B

    i mean, you are right that it was started in New York by a group call Improv Everywhere…

    the facebook message i got, and the event in DC, was organized by a group called DC Defenestrators. the fact that 1200-1500 people showed up IN NEW YORK, might have been a good thing to mention, however, it has little to do with DC.

    but thanks for your insight Oppenheimer.

  • Michael says:

    “but thanks for your insight Oppenheimer.”

    If you mean this how I think you mean it it’s one of the best insults I’ve read, and that includes mine.

  • yo. says:

    jesus christ is this the sort of pointless “art” party photographers partake in when they’re not photographing coked out 20 somethings?

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  • JIMMZYS JONEZYS says:

    Yo dis be JIMMZYS JONEZYS. Where b my pics? They no load.