I’m an only child and I want a lot of things, and I want them right now.

1. A New Tennis Bag

(source)

2. Luxury Chainsaws.

3. To Go on a Tornado Tour

(source)

4. Sample All The World’s Flavors of Doritos.

5. For All Sleeves To Be Animal Sleeves

BONUS*

6. Four Words: Playboy Caravan, Lake Havasu

DOUBLE BONUS**

7. An Off-the-Bedroom Bar Designed By Alphonse Mucha.

TRIPLE BONUS***

8. To Have Reading/ Nap Time Scheduled Like In Lower School.

QUADRUPLE BONUS****

9. Stuart Davis.

SUPER BONUS********

10. A Life Supply of Alf Ice Cream Pops

ULTIMATE BONUS******

11. Dominick Dunne’s Power, Privilege, and Justice, The Complete Series.

Supreme Bonus****************

12. To Lead a Life That Is At Least 1/10 as superficially Glamorous as 1980s Roy.